The Peaceful Mind Podcast
Episode 83- When To Talk and Not Listen
FULL TRANSCRIPT (with timecode)
00:00:00:16 - 00:00:04:12
You are listening to episode 83 of the Peaceful Mind podcast.
00:00:13:02 - 00:00:37:04
Welcome to the Peaceful Mind podcast, a place for creating the peace of mind, you need to be the best mom you were created by God to be. If you want to bring more balance, more joy in more peace to your motherhood. This is the place for you. I'm your host, certified life coach at Catholic mom Danielle Thienel. In the name of the father of the son and of the Holy Spirit.
00:00:37:13 - 00:00:38:18
Let's get started.
00:00:44:18 - 00:01:27:15
Hi, everyone, thank you for joining me here on the podcast. If before I dive in, if you would just indulge me for a moment. I want to take the time to read you a email that I got from a client who I just wrapped up with after working nine months together. And the reason why I want you to hear the message that she sent me is because not for what it says about me personally. Because when someone sends me gratitude and their love for how their life has changed, I never see it as something that I personally take on.
00:01:28:01 - 00:02:00:24
I really always kind of replace the word you when they're saying, like you have been or you've taught me and I put the word coaching in there. Coaching is showing them their own mind and questioning and helping them see what they already know or haven't been seeing for themselves before. And so I guide their brain. I guide the direction of their thinking and their patterns.
00:02:01:20 - 00:02:47:16
And yes, I also include some teaching moments of these concepts and tools that go with life coaching. But I want you to know when I read this to you that I want you to see what is possible that coaching could have you saying in a couple of months, or, you know, a year how you might be different if you had your mind shown to you and you had the guidance and accountability and support to retrain your brain in a way that got you closer to experiencing what you want to experience in this life and all your goals.
00:02:47:26 - 00:03:26:10
So as I read this, I know that whenever you hear her saying Danielle, or you did this, I want you to know, I want you to yourself to put in the word coaching and imagine the possibility. I am grateful for our time together. You have changed my life. You were an answer to prayers and a bomb to my soul. I know that all you have given me and taught me and showed me has changed me forever and enabled me to continue to grow and become closer to my best self.
00:03:27:06 - 00:04:16:00
I am also excited to practice being more intentional in my life and become clearly aware of what I want to create. I know and trust that I can do it and can create any result I want. I have you to thank for that. OK, now I'm going to reread it in instead of the words you, I'm going to put coaching because this is the way I receive when I get messages like that, this is how I receive it because I know that it isn't me that I have already asked Christ to be a channel through me and to use me to help his flock and those on the other end.
00:04:16:02 - 00:04:29:01
And guess what? The the avenue to make this happen is life coaching. So let me reread it again, and this time I'm going to put coaching in there every time, she said you.
00:04:30:18 - 00:05:12:28
I am grateful for our time spent coaching. Coaching has changed my life. Coaching was an answer to prayers, and coaching was a bomb to my soul. I know that all coaching has given me and taught me and showed me has changed me forever. And enabled me to continue to grow and become closer to my best self. I am also excited to practice being more intentional in my life and become clearly aware of what I want to create, and I know and trust that I can do it and can create any result I want.
00:05:13:10 - 00:05:15:29
And I have coaching to thank for that.
00:05:17:24 - 00:05:48:25
Now, this client has a lot of knowledge now, and she has seen the work really work and change her life, but I want you to know that if you haven't gone through it and you haven't committed, then you are like how she was on the beginning before she started. She said a prayer that she wanted help. But guess what? She had to listen to the answer that God gave her.
00:05:49:13 - 00:06:21:23
She had to take action when she was prompted with an answer. And then she had to make an investment in coaching, and then she had to commit. She had to commit to show up. Week by week. And then when she showed up, she had to be open, open to listening and receiving coaching. And then in between sessions, she had to apply what she was learning. So I just wanted to say that, yeah, we have an after.
00:06:21:25 - 00:06:59:04
That's what I read when we finally get to the place where we want to be. But there is some unknown uncertainty and maybe a little bit of fear to try something new on the front end. And it takes actual action and some hard work and a lot of fun I might add in between. To get on the other side, but I just wanted to share that with you. All said that you had this perspective that it is the coaching and you know, you'll want to know if that person that you drive with, if that if I'm the right one for you.
00:06:59:12 - 00:07:32:28
And that's how the way that you find out is coming to a call so you can see if I'm the person that you want to be helping you. But I just thought that I would share that perspective of a of a client and what she was thinking and feel and thinking and feeling about coaching after we concluded our time together. OK, so thank you for allowing me to have that sort of lengthy introduction to this week's podcast. So I am going to make it short, sweet and to the point in you having a big takeaway.
00:07:33:20 - 00:08:04:28
And so here is the subject of this week's episode. I want you to learn how to talk to yourself more than you listen to yourself. And when you talk to yourself, I want you to believe it. OK, so here's what I mean. We have this constant kind of real of chatter going on inside of our mind, right? We think thousands and thousands of thoughts a day.
00:08:05:06 - 00:08:46:07
We have sentences and phrases that come in and come out and some of them stick there and stay for a while. But the whole thing is that it's as amazing as our brain is and as many thoughts that come there really are only. Some that kind of that we consciously keep and we can't consciously think about and do that on repeat. And that's where our focus is, is on these thoughts. And so we have this kind of dual personality within our brain, right? The way that I teach my clients, there's a higher brain and a lower brain, and the higher brain is that one we want to learn how to tap into.
00:08:46:09 - 00:09:17:04
And that's the one is where we get to decide where we're conscious and we plan our life and we pick on purpose the things that we're going to think about. And then there's this lower brain, and that is the part that is built to make us survive. Right? It is. It is our kind of alarm system for emergencies. But as our life has evolved, we don't need it as much because the type of emergencies it tries to tell us is don't change. It likes the same things.
00:09:17:14 - 00:09:48:15
It doesn't want anything painful to happen. And and so it keeps us from taking steps that might be risky or put us at, you know, in a vulnerable place. And we want to listen less to that part because it really does keep our life small and keeps us from going after big, challenging things. We want to tap into the higher brain. And so when I am asking you to talk to yourself more than you listen, it's because.
00:09:49:18 - 00:10:37:17
The list, if we listen to what our brain will like kind of naturally and automatically tell us that'll be coming from the lower brain. So it's going to be telling us things like don't try or take a rest or that'll be hard or you don't want to make that change. You'll be uncomfortable or it's talking about like, you know, don't don't exude too much energy and you might want to like, you know, just go easy on things, which of course, you know, there there are a lot of things in our life where that might be helpful, but on the majority, it is telling us things like you'll never lose weight or you don't deserve this or that or gosh, good moms don't do that.
00:10:38:01 - 00:11:13:24
Or it'll just say, you know, that'll take too long. So you might as well not even try or remember how you failed at that lot last time. This is that lower part of our brain, and the whole thing is that. You've been listening to this part, and I want you to stop listening to that part and the way that we do that is that we start talking to ourselves. We start tapping into the higher brain and we start talking to ourselves, deliberately saying, I'm an amazing mom, I can do hard things.
00:11:14:03 - 00:11:44:06
It's OK that it's uncomfortable. It's going to make me stronger. I have God by my side so I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. You've got this, Danielle, how are you doing today? Love? Do you need to have something that's a little bit more caring for you? What can you do to serve you and your family today? You are amazing. There's no one else like you. You were meant to be their mom.
00:11:44:08 - 00:12:25:20
How do we know? Because you are? You know, that little dream inside your heart, you can take one action today to move closer to that. I deserve to take care of myself. Can you see that if you make a point to talk to yourself in this way? Then your brain won't have the capacity to be listening to that other part that is trying to offer you things that don't serve your life. So when it comes to negative self talk, negative self-criticism that's going on in our life, we don't want to listen to it.
00:12:26:13 - 00:13:02:09
We need to stop listening to it. It's coming from a part of our brain that tells us that things are an emergency that we need to not change or evolve or grow or challenge ourself, that it'll be too hard. I want you to put a stop to that. I want you to recognize that that is not true, that in that you don't have to listen to it. And I want you to start talking to yourselves, talking to yourselves in in a loving, gentle cheerleading type of way.
00:13:02:27 - 00:13:36:13
The way what would God be saying to you if he was sitting right next to you? He would be your biggest fan, your biggest cheerleader. He would tell you how amazing that you are and you have that capability to do that for yourself. But again, as wonderful as our brain is, it can't talk to itself and listen to itself at the same time. So you have to pick one, and I want you to start picking the one where you are talking to yourself.
00:13:36:29 - 00:14:08:04
And then I want you to add the extra that whatever you're saying, I want you to just believe it. Just decide that you're amazing and that you have every capability and that you're strong. And that life is good and that you can create anything you want and that every day is a new day to start again. Yes. And I want you to believe it. Just decide, you know, it's a choice, we get to believe what we think.
00:14:08:12 - 00:14:40:24
If that's what we want to believe. So that's my simple message for you today. Learn to talk to yourself more than you listen. And what you're saying to yourself when you talk to yourself, I want you to believe it. OK, mamas, I just adore each and every one of you, I love hearing for you. Thank you for your feedback and know that I attribute the work that I am doing right now to.
00:14:41:27 - 00:15:17:28
The impact that coaching has had on my life personally and how it's transformed it in a way that I now just work through that to be a channel to others out there. OK, I will see you next week. Have a great one. Thank you for tuning in to today's episode of the Peaceful Mind podcast. Are you ready to take everything I teach you here and put it to work for your own life to really learn how to have peace of mind, no matter what is happening around you? If so, I'd love to have you as a client, as your coach.
00:15:18:00 - 00:15:42:21
This is where you'll get personal and focused time on your own mind, using life coaching tools, concepts and proven life transforming wisdom all through a faith filled lens. To learn more about how we can work together. Come on over to DanielleThienel.Com. Welcome there. You'll see how to sign up for a free coaching consult and learn how to get started. Until next time. Peace be with you, always.
