The Peaceful Mind Podcast
Episode 90-Borrowing Thoughts
FULL TRANSCRIPT (with timecode)
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You are listening to Episode 90 of the Peaceful Mind podcast.
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Welcome to the Peaceful Mind podcast. A place for creating the peace of mind. You need to be the best. Mom you were created by God to be. If you want to bring more balance, more joy, and more peace to your motherhood. This is the place for you. I'm your host, certified life coach at Catholic mom Danielle Thienel, all in the name of the father of the Son and of the Holy Spirit. Let's get started.
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Hi everyone. Welcome back to the podcast and I am so glad you're here because today I'm going to be talking to you about borrowing thoughts and this is going to be so powerful for your life. And as always, it will bring you more peace of mind. It'll bring you more peace of mind because you will know that you are changing the way you think about yourself and what's capable for your life. And that in itself feels amazing.
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It makes us feel like we're a little bit at peace because we're more in control and we're more thinking the thought that we are on our way. So borrowing thoughts is something that I do a lot, and I am doing this podcast because of a recent trip that I made where I was in person with my own business coaching group. So where I'm a member of, so being in a group, I am surrounded by other people who have similar goals than I do, and we're all at different places in our businesses.
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And so my one of the main things I did on purpose that I set out to do as I listened and heard the feedback and what was going on with everyone else around me, I, I wanted to focus on two things. One, I wanted to focus on how they were just like me, because I love the thought that I'm not alone on this journey. Right? Entrepreneurship can be very lonely.
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And I love to think when I hear other people tell me that they also are at a place and feeling the way I do, even they're trying the things I'm trying. And then the second thing that I really was honing in on are what do they have? What if they created for themselves? That I haven't achieved yet, but that I really want. You know, not everybody was doing a business or was in a place that, you know, or exactly similar to my goals.
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But mostly there were people who were very similar to me and they're like, what somebody could see as way ahead or farther along, or just to have already achieved aspects of what I'm after. And so the second thing I really took note of was what were some of their thoughts? Like, what were they saying about how they got there, how they were feeling, what it took to get there? And then I wrote down what really sort of just kind of like struck me as something that I wasn't believing right now and that I wanted to actually borrow their thoughts.
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Did you know that you could even do that? Like, let me back up and just say, did you know that there's what you're thinking and that there's what other people are thinking? But we're all just creating our own results. And so whenever we have this new perspective from someone else, like, Oh, I kind of want what they have, but not in that
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I want to be different than who I am kind of aspect. But the results that they're creating in your life, like, like that's, that's a goal I want to achieve or I want to experience that or I want to have that in my life. Then they have it because of what they were thinking, because that's create our results in our life. So I want to know and tap into and get familiar with what it is that they're thinking. And I want you to just know that you can borrow that thought as well.
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Now, it's not going to feel real maybe to you it won't feel even comfortable at first. But learning to believe new things, which was, you know, a podcast that I did a few weeks ago, that you can go back and find and listen to that teaches you how to believe new things, but deciding on what it is, that new thing that you want to believe it will take focus and practice and application and work to get there.
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And then how you can start is you can borrow other people's thoughts because a belief or someone else's thought, their belief, it's nothing more than a chronic pattern of thought. And you have the ability, if you even try a little bit, to begin a new pattern, to tell a new story about yourself in your life and what's. Possible. And when you on purpose focus to new ways that you want to think are things that you want to believe, then you begin to achieve.
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You first you shift and then you achieve a different energy, a different vibration, a different feeling. And then that drives new actions. And with that up level of feeling, you are now attracting to you a whole different result. So for instance, I'm going to give the example. What's it called? I think it's called The Last Dance. Right. This is am I going to get this wrong? Is this might Michael Jordan's the it's I think it's on Netflix and it's a documentary about Michael Jordan's life.
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So if you are someone who is young or well, I guess age doesn't matter. But let's say you want to, you know, up your skills in basketball. Then watching that documentary, I would hone in and hear what was what was Michael Jordan thinking? What are some of the thoughts that he used and then believed that got him results of either winning games or higher amount of
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three pointer shots? I don't know. My my brain does pick this example. And so I'm going with it. But like, you see what the point I'm making is that he had to have thought patterns that gave him the result, particular thoughts and beliefs about himself, about the game of basketball, about what was possible for him, about his physique, about his game. You know, all of that. And what he was thinking actually got him to win and championship.
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And so I know that when I watched the documentary, it showed about, you know, how hard he practiced and how he thought even when the other team members are going off to do something else. I'm going in and practicing my shots. Well, those are his beliefs. His beliefs are I want to spend my time here because this is going to help me get better. And so if you're someone who wants to have some of the achievements, the things that Michael Jordan has, you can borrow his thoughts and to start thinking and believing them for yourself today.
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And you can have huge strides and jumps in in what you see as possible for yourself. Because if you keep your same patterns of thoughts that you have now, the ones that aren't serving you, do you know that you're only just going to create more of the same? So if you want something different, feel free to borrow thoughts. Because most of us have no adequate conception of our inherent power and ability.
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In this human life. Because at heart, we always underestimate ourselves. We don't really believe in ourselves. And for that reason, we remain just ineffective and just small and below our potential. So getting back to the recent group I went, I want to share with you because I had made a list of the thoughts that I wanted to borrow from these these beautiful people who had what I was wanting to have.
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And so I wrote down what they were thinking. And I want to share with you today those thoughts. And and if you want to borrow them for your life, then please do start thinking and believing them for yourself. Focus your brain every day. Write it down on a post-it note. Have the app that reminds you and has your voice speaking to you every day. I don't know. Whatever it takes for you to make some kind of concerted effort to have new ways of thinking and thought patterns.
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Now, of course, you know, my favorite answer for that is regular coaching. When you have a coach, the coaches always going to see what thoughts aren't serving you and then help you find new ones to go after and believe. And then they also serve as that accountability and support and check in to help you move along with these patterns. And if you haven't already knowing that in a group setting, this is really, really powerful because like, for instance, in my small group, my mom life coaching program, small group program, this is a perfect place for you to be with other moms.
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And then remember, there's those two things I said that we want to go after. One, we want to hear people their thoughts and see their lives and hear about them and realize.
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I'm not alone in this. They, too, are struggling with what I'm struggling like there's oh, I'm normal. It's okay. You know, I'm just again, I'm not the only one. And then second of all, when they are making strides and they're saying that they have wins and they're creating amazing things in their life, you get to borrow what they're thinking and try it out for yourself. Not every thought they're thinking will work for you, but you won't know until you try.
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So and to let you know that there is a wait list for you to join if you are interested in being in the know and knowing all the details for my next group when it opens up, this group beside a balanced will help you go to these new thought patterns and to help you go from this busy, overwhelming life to be balanced and in control and more peaceful, in more joy. So be sure to check the show notes so you can join the waitlist so you won't miss out on any of that information.
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But I am going to let you know now some of the thoughts that I am now borrowing from my group that I was recently with. Okay, here, let's go. Let's dive in. So here are some of the thoughts. First one. There is never a time you have to put pressure on yourself. Oh, I love this. Right. Think about that. There's never a time when you have to put pressure on yourself, because pressure is a feeling that comes from your thoughts.
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And I love this idea. I want to become a person that if I find myself feeling pressured, I can borrow this belief that there's never a time where I have to have to do this, put pressure on myself. Okay. This here's another. Another one. Nothing takes time. It only takes alignment. Okay. And then when I hear the word alignment, I. Oh, my. My brain always defines that is like feeling good. Because I know that if I'm in a state of feeling good, then I know I will have good actions that I take from that feeling, and I'll create amazing results.
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So if I if I put myself into a good feeling place, then when I go to do whatever I have to do it, it most likely it'll go well and it'll flow and I'll get to the end. Whereas sometimes when we think something is taking a long time, it's literally because we're just feeling drudge through it and dread and resistance of it. So I, I am borrowing and focusing my brain on this thought.
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Nothing takes time. It only takes alignment. Okay. The next thought on borrowing small hinges. Swing big doors. Yeah, I remember. I just. Now I just see and visualize a huge door and then it just has a couple small hinges on it. That's all it needs. And the what I interpret this is, is that really big achievements, big goals that I want to go after. It only takes small steps to get there because I if I just do small steps every day, it's going to add up to huge things.
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So this thought small hinges swing big doors. Okay, next thought, I do all the hard things. Yes, I can remember. I can see my colleague, my peer talking about what was going on and all of you know, how she used to just think and kind of blame others. Like I'm doing all the hard things and you're doing all the easy things. And, you know, usually that leads us to more thoughts like it's not fair or I shouldn't have to do it all.
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But when she decided that she was going to start believing like, no, I just I just am the one who does all the hard things then. Everything changed for her because she didn't have to waste any mental energy and space just thinking that, you know, she shouldn't have to do it all. She just got focused and said, no, I actually do all the hard things. And when she thought about that, it actually made her feel amazing because she was just like, Yeah, that is kind of my superpower, that I do all the hard things.
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And in that way, it opened her up to not being fearful of hard things because she just starts to believe. And that is a new belief for her that that she can do the hard things and then she does do them. So I love that one. Okay. I needed this one here. Here's the next thought. On the other side of boredom. There is a version of myself I'm missing out on. Okay. When was the last time you were bored, Mama? Probably your brain first, probably said never or a long time.
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And here's the thing. I was kind of getting to this place lately, too, where I couldn't remember the last time I was actually bored, because a lot of us don't want to be bored. We want to be, you know. It doesn't feel great. And so we're just always on the go and we just want to do, do, do so we can get everything done, done, done. But here's the thing. I actually now in learning to believe that this is a goal for myself to get to the place where I'm not in the the mode of doing all the time.
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But I get to where I'm I'm bored and I'm willing for that to be a little uncomfortable because in that time it will probably cause me to be still and to just kind of slow my brain down. And instead of thinking now that, Oh, I should really fill this time with something to do, I want to now be find myself in the place of boredom, because now I believe that there is a version of myself. That will benefit from the slowing down, from the spaciousness in my schedule.
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And and plus that's the time when new ideas come or maybe something new in adventurous or a new hobby or something will be born. And I'm just not letting myself get to the place for that to come out or to come to me, because I'm always filling my calendar and going, going and rushing and doing things. So the new thought that I am believing is that on the other side of boredom, there is a version of myself that I'm missing out on.
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And to continue on that belief, I don't want to miss out on her any more. So I'm actually looking forward to finding places of boredom in my life now. Okay. This one I think we're all going to benefit from. So definitely write it down, press pause. Go get a piece of paper if you haven't already. I probably should have mentioned that writing these down would be amazing. For you to have and recall. And then there's also, you know, access to transcripts of each of these podcasts, and you can find that in the show notes, too.
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So that's something you can do, is that you can print it out and go back and highlight these thoughts. And then now you'll have a new belief plan to start thinking about. Okay, so here it is. Anxiety is fueled by one belief. I can't handle it. Okay, so when I heard this thought from someone else, I wanted to borrow it as a beautiful reminder. So whenever I'm feeling anxious. Then it is most likely coming from the thought like that.
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Whatever's going on, whatever circumstances happen in my life that I'm coming from the thought I can't handle it. And so now I am borrowing the belief when I when anxiety comes, that now I'm going to borrow the belief that I can handle it. Like even if really at first it feels awful and it's something that I my brain is telling me, no, no, no, no, Danielle, you really can't handle this. This is too big for you. I now know.
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Oh, I'm the person who's learning to think this new belief about myself. So I'm going to apply in practice and choose on purpose. The thought I can handle it. I can handle this. Imagine if. You believed that? About anything that came your way, Mom. Anything. What if your first thought that your brain went to was, I can handle this? I can handle this.
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Yeah. No matter what comes, I can handle this. We sure know that Christ can handle it. So we can also, you know, say if you're not feeling that you can't you can say, Lord, please, can you help me handle this? Help me figure out to be the person who can handle this or I'm becoming the person who handles this. With your help, I can handle this. So good. Next time you're feeling anxious. Try that thought.
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Borrow it from me today. Okay. Next one. I do what I say I'm going to do. This is so good when this comes late to our calendar, everyone. We have things that we want to do or feel like we have to do, need to do or we should do. But we don't want to do. But what if we chose the things that we want to do? And then you always were a person who who believed about themselves that I do what I say I'm going to do.
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So then that means whatever you've put on the calendar. The time comes to do it, even if it's not something that's fun, you know, like gather the taxes or pay the bills or do the laundry or cook that meal for a friend, whatever it is. When the time comes, you're like, Oh, you know, your brain's going to say like, Oh, I just I don't want to do this. But you have these goals that you want to hit these results, this kind of life, that you want to be the type of person you want to show up.
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So you can borrow that belief and start believing this about yourself that I do what I say I'm going to do, even if it's hard, even if it's uncomfortable, even if something else is way more pleasurable. Especially like if you're someone who gets distracted a lot. But if you practice the belief I do what I say I'm going to do, then that will keep you committed. To your schedule and your goals, and then you will start creating so many amazing things. But it all still comes from your thoughts, how you're thinking, okay, this one is so good for the I'm actually going to put both of these together because to me, they fall under the title of the umbrella of perfectionism, which I proudly tell you all that I am a recovering perfectionist, and it's something that I teach a lot about in my group, how to overcome, because it will just it'll just change your life for the better.
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And so these two thoughts I love the first one is kind of funny the that I heard someone said and I'm like, oh, I'm borrowing that and the thought is perfect is creepy. That's right. Like, what is that one movie? It's, it's it's alluding my brain right now but it was it went was all of the that like perfect town and then it was like perfect women and they were all like kind of robot ish, right? Anyways, my mind went there and it's like, it's super creepy.
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It's super creepy to watch someone, like, be totally put together and totally perfect all the time and be able to do that, you know, just do everything. What we all define as perfectly because because we're, we're not we're not robots, we're human beings and we're not going to have perfection until the till eternity. So it is kind of creepy. So any time I find myself thinking that something I'm doing needs to be perfect, I'm now borrowing the belief that, Oh, perfect is creepy and I don't want to be creepy.
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And then the other perfectionist thought is.
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Seek to move rather than improve. Seek to move rather than improve. When I sit down to, let's say, record this podcast, like right now, I could be stopping every time I have a long pause or misspeak or have lots of arms or something like that. But I am choosing to just move to just keep talking in the microphone. To keep going. To not worry about that.
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And and then for me, it it improves everything because I will be finished and done with the podcast and I will go ahead and get it out to all of you all. Instead, if I. If I. If I needed. To improve the recording itself. It would it would stop my progress in life. It would slow me down. And so I'm always wanting to seek progress.
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And I want I want to seek to move forward rather than to stop and improve everything, trying to make it perfect. So that's a beautiful thought. You can borrow, seek to move rather than improve. And I kind of like say extend that to say improve to perfection because perfection is creepy. Yeah, I love that one. Okay, couple more here. I could be this way my whole life and still choose to love myself.
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I remember hearing this from the first time for the first time, and I was like, I love that. Right. Because so much of our lives, like, we do want to change. And I'll just give like, let's just say our our body, for example, when we have. Things about our body, right, that we are not were focusing on. And when we think about them, it is not taking us to love ourselves. We think that, you know, we could we could we have to change or it makes us feel bad about ourselves.
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I just want to say that, like when you come to the conclusion that your body does not have to change one bit for you to love yourself and that you could be that whole that way. Like for the rest of your life, whatever it is about your body that you don't like, like you could be that way. There could be no change. And you still could choose. That's. That that move you closer towards and expand and have you grow love for yourself.
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That this is just so comforting to me. When I heard this belief, I'm like, Oh, I want that. You can. You can be that way. However, it is for the rest of your life. Think of some characteristic about yourself or some personality trait and just think, yeah, you could be that way your whole life, but you could still love yourself. So good. Okay. If I want to go somewhere, I should first know where I want to go. Someone said that this is what they've learned in the journey they have.
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They have found that, right? Well, they've tried lots of things and they made no headway. But as soon as they realize this belief, like, oh, yes, I really should first know where I want to go. Get clear on the destination, get exactly specific on where it is. I want to go because when I do that. Then it really like, you know, puts me on the right path. And so I was like, yes, I have to remind myself that I want this belief. I'm going to borrow it when I first find out where I want to go then.
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It's going to be a lot more smooth. And I this is what I do with my moms when I work with you one on one and when I work with you in my group setting, this is kind of the first place where we start. We're going to get clear on where it is you want to go. That's really important. Let's do that first. Let's make this path for you easier and more quickly. You know, get to it. And so we can flounder by ourselves. But you know that option to have my help to help you get there.
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Is there? All right. I've left the last belief that I'm going to offer you today to borrow for last. That is. That was my favorite. That was the most impactful from this in-person group coaching event that I am a member of. And this one was just so brilliant and I hadn't focused on it before. And I have been using it ever since and really becoming the person who now that I believe this.
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And so here's the thought. The thought is just because the chrysalis is still doesn't mean the great change isn't happening. Let me read that again. Just because the chrysalis is still doesn't mean the great change isn't happening. I remember hearing this and my whole body just relaxed.
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And so I knew. I know it's it's. There's that inner little tingle that I get and it is like it's the Holy Spirit. And the Holy Spirit was saying, yes, Daniel, you need this one. And so, first of all, I'm going to just read you what the well, let's just talk about the definition of chrysalis for anyone who read it at first and like didn't know what it was. It is the part. It's when you've got the caterpillar is not yet the butterfly. Right. So it's it's transformed already from the egg to the caterpillar.
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And then the next stage is to go to the chrysalis before finally it is the adult butterfly. It's the it's the stage where, you know, it's like wrapped up in the cocoon and just hanging there. And if you looked at it, you would think that nothing is happening because it's just so still. But inside, a lot is going on. There's a lot of moving, a lot of growing.
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And then it's like it doesn't look like anything's happening. But then what? What? Then finally comes this amazing, gorgeous, beautiful butterfly. And so I have lots of times in my business and in sometimes in my life to where I'm like.
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Like thinking nothing's happening. Or more on the road of like nothing's working. Or I'm doing all these things and trying all these things, but I'm not seeing any kind of result or benefit or, you know, just kind of questioning. And so now I have borrowed this belief and know, like, that's not true. Even when I'm just in and have more stillness in my life or it's more prayer or meditation, it just it just doesn't feel like anything is happening.
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But no, that is where the greatest change is happening. And I just want you to just apply that right. Right now, what have you been working towards and making putting some major effort towards? And it feels like it's not giving you what it is that you need. I mean, is it something with your kids to where you feel like that you've been trying to do things, but you know what? They they are listening and watching and absorbing. And we might not get to know what that final great change and impact we're having on them till till later.
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But just believe that it is happening. So that thought one last time is just because the chrysalis is still doesn't mean the great change isn't happening. Okay. Those are the thoughts that I pulled that I am now personally working on borrowing. And I wanted to let you know in today's episode that this is available for you to. What? Who? Who? Who do you look up to? Or,
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you know, people who have what it is that you want. And what are they thinking? Ask them their thoughts about it. Even if you ask them, how did you get there? They will tell you their thoughts and feelings. And that's what we want to concentrate on. Not even exactly the action they did. But if there is a place you want to go or something you want to have and you just don't have it right now, it's just we haven't tapped into the thoughts that will get you there.
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And I hope you found some on my list today to be helpful for you. And if you have and you apply them and you see the changes, let me know. And if you want help and you want to take this work and everything that I speak about deeper and have a coach help you actually apply this transformation of your thought patterns in your mind so you can have amazing new results in your life. Then please come to my free peace strategy.
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Call all the information to sign up for that call is in the show notes. And as always, I just want you to know that I just wish you so much peace and joy. And I love you all. Thanks for listening and I will talk to you again next week. Thank you for tuning in to today's episode of the Peaceful Mind podcast. Are you ready to take everything I teach you here and put it to work for your own life? To really learn how to have peace of mind no matter what is happening around you? If so, I'd love to have you as a client, as your coach.
00:34:26:26 - 00:34:51:16
This is where you'll get personal and focused time on your own mind, using life coaching tools, concepts, and proven life transforming wisdom all through a faith filled lens. To learn more about how we can work together, come on over to DanielleThienel.com. There you'll see how to sign up for a free coaching consult and learn how to get started. Until next time. Peace be with you always.