Episode 103- 10 Peace Restoring Tips
You are listening to episode 103 of the peaceful mind podcast.
Welcome to the peaceful mind podcast, a place for creating the peace of mind. You need to be the best mom you are created by God to be. If you wanna bring more balance, more joy and more peace to your motherhood, this is the place for you. I'm your host certified life coach at Catholic mom, Danielle Thienel. In the name of the father of the son and of the holy spirit.
Let's get started.
Hello everyone. Thanks so much for joining me. Welcome back to the podcast. I wanna just start out by thanking you for your feedback. I love hearing from. and I'm hearing that you are applying what you're learning here. And some of you are telling me that you are listening and it's helping you. And, you know, for example, I got an email this past week from a mom who just had a real breakthrough in a story, um, that she kept telling herself for years that kept her feeling shame about it.
And something from the podcast helped her be able to. Think about it in a different way and see things for what they really were, which definitely has to do with her whole complete worthiness as a human being. And it's, it's things like that when you reach out and let me know, um, that really make this all worth it because I am so passionate about helping moms realize that there is another way to.
Not have to delay joy because we get this one life and you feeling better is really a priority. And when you do, you become the most effective mom. And that is something that is really important to us. Okay. So today we are going to talk about my 10 piece restoring tips for you to have. A more balanced life.
I'm gonna dive in and start with number one. Number one is do whatever it takes to commit and carry out. Having 15 minutes of silence a day, the goal being for you to slow down, to have some amount of daily time where you can think. And breathe, take a few breaths, do nothing. And even if the rest of the day is full and you're constantly moving, we want to have, or make a concerted effort to become consistent in having some time of silence, a.
This effort to be still, especially for those who are a member of a religion and believe that this is where we can then hear God where God is found is in this silence. And I wanna say, and I have nine more tips for you, but if you only do this one. On this whole list or this whole episode that I offer, make this be the one you might not be able to start with 15 minutes a day.
Sometimes I fit in five, but the concerted effort. And when you become consistent, making it be something that matters to you to find 15 minutes of time when you are quiet. You quiet, your mind, you concentrate on your breath and you don't like speak or not distracted by, um, you know, the dings on our phone or our computer.
And I know mama's for some of you when you're in a stage of motherhood where you have the young kids and it's summertime, it can be difficult, but like I always teach here. If you are committed to something and you're determined to find a way, then it, it opens up for you the path you'll see and find moments for me.
I remember that it used to be in Carline, right when I would be waiting for them to get out of school. But now I do make it happen in the morning. When I start my day, sometimes it's I already will get up. And maybe you. Say hi to everybody clean up the kitchen, brush my teeth, make my bed, you know, and then I sit down, um, I've done this in a previous episode about letting you know my morning routine, which includes, um, really having this silent time and prayer time.
Okay. Number two of my piece, restoring tips is to do a focused thought download. Of all the things in your life right now that you are busy with get it out of your head and onto paper and start each answer with, I have to, because a lot of times this is what your brain is believing. When we go to make our to-do list, it's thinking, oh, I have to do this.
I have to remember to do this. I have to go here today. And. Just go ahead and naturally get it out of your brain of all the things that you are just busy with. Okay. And then once you do that, once you get out all the things you're juggling, then go back on this list and I want you to cross out the word, have like, have to, and I want you to replace it with, choose to sometimes you might wanna.
I want to, and just having this switch can bring you peace in that moment, because you are releasing this pressure that the word have to brings to our bodies. Whenever anyone thinks that we have to do something, we feel a little trapped and kind of like locked in, but a lot of the things that are on your.
They might not be fun, right? Like when we have to do laundry or we have to go to the post office. Um, but you actually ultimately think of the result that you will get when you do mail that package, or when you do have something clean to put on, then you actually want to choose to do those things, but how you feel about it.
Is what's important, cuz that's gonna probably tell you whether you're gonna, you know, go on to even do the action. And so we want to come with our thoughts about it from a place that isn't pressured. Okay. And so my tip to restore your peace is that with all that you are juggling as much as you can on a daily basis.
First get out all that you think that you have to. And then physically cross off that word have to, and write in the word, choose to, and maybe when you're doing that, you will say, no, I don't actually have to do this and I don't even choose to do it. And then that can go away and then you can put your efforts and energy to the things that you really do wanna choose to do, and you can immediately feel more peace about it.
Okay. Number three, my third tip to restore your peace. It's building on number two is I want you to learn to say yes to things that you wanna do and no to things you don't wanna do, even if your brain is telling you and you feel as if you should saying no, even if what that means ultimately means is you'll have to say yes to being uncomfortable and doing hard things.
Because sometimes when we say no to, I don't know, eating a bowl of ice cream, it means that we're gonna have to do something hard, which is go without it, manage my cravings, manage my feelings for it. Right. But like I said, how it was built on number two is that we have this idea of what we need to be doing should be doing.
And we just automatically say yes, because of the story we say about those things, but I find so much peace in my life when I decide that I actually, I, I shouldn't do that and I don't have to do that, or I don't wanna do it. And I'm gonna say no. And then vice versa. There are some things that I'm saying no to, because I don't wanna get uncomfortable.
And I don't, you know, my brain is telling me that would be awful. That would be painful. Like when it comes to working out or something like that, like I ultimately wanna be healthy. And sometimes I have to tell my brain, I'm gonna say yes to that because it's hard, but I still want the ultimate result.
Okay. So. Just pause before you say yes or no to something and you will instantly get some peace in your life. If it's coming from this place where you can get a little, like become the watcher of it and make a, a decision before you jump into. Number four out of our 10 tips for peace and to move from the busyness that we have going on in our life to being more balanced.
And that is to pray. Now, notice how, I just barely mention that in that number one tip about silence. Now some of you might wanna combine. Some of, you might wanna combine your silent time with prayer, but I separated it because I wanted you to know that we can pray without carving out this big amount of time and dedicating.
Maybe for, if it's you, if it's reading the scriptures or if it is just, you know, saying a rosary or just a couple, our fathers, or just having, you know, this, this kind of sacred space dedicated, you know, if you can do that wonderful, but to restore peace into your daily life, sometimes we just need to. Pray fast.
We just need to call out his name. We just need to do the sign of the cross and, and in some form or fashion, how can you connect with God? If you can carve out the time, make the time and, and find a longer, of course I would advocate for that. But. Want to be realistic in that sometimes when we think, when we have to do something major, like go to a holy hour, then we end up not doing it at all, because it seems like too much.
And again, it comes back to, it's overwhelming to think about having to add one more thing to our daily to-do list. And right there is a perfect example of where you can work prayer in. If you finish your to-do list, take a moment to ask him what to keep on your list and what to let go of, ask him to make your path straight for the rest of the.
I do that every day. When I say, please Lord, make my crooked path straight, ask him to take care of some of the things himself. I did a whole podcast on that that has to do with your God to do list. And if you, I I'll go ahead and add something in the show notes that has you has us linking up to getting your hands on the God to-do list that I created.
And we wanna ask him to bless our plans, right? You believe, whatever you believe, what matters to focus on, you can, you can always ask for his help. And if you ask, you will receive no ifs, ands, or buts, it's done giving thanks. And praise is a beautiful way to praise pray every day to how you fit it in just a quick.
Thank you. Even if it's small. It does take you having to pause your thoughts and then to, you know, redirect your thoughts towards heaven. And this in itself really is something that, um, he wants us to do. And so just tell him what's on your heart during the day. Even if it's like, Lord, I am frustrated and I just can't see straight and I need your help.
And that's. That will be adding prayer and you will be restored to peace. He will show you a straight path where otherwise where without it, it may remain crooked. Okay. Number five, I'm ready to move on to number five. The peace restoring tip is to constrain in my coaching practice. I see this one, um, you know, really tripping moms.
In that they are doing so many things and making progress like a little bit in each of them, they dabble over here and they're doing this and a little bit of that. However, to restore peace, I have found that this method of constraining thinking about all the things you're doing in a way where you are focusing as much as possible on one at a time.
So it's about doing less at a time so that you then accomplish more. And I, I visualize you just racking up a bunch of, of done things. For lack of a better word, right? Like you have a pile of things that I'm finished with, and that happens mostly when you constrain and focus on one. I mean, you can try and do all things at once if you want.
Right. You'll just most likely make. Just a little headway with all of the things, and it'll take you longer to get to the finish line, or you could take 20 steps in just one direction, put all your energy and focus on getting one big project done and accomplish that goal faster. So you'll then be freed up and open to go after another goal.
How many of you relate to this? How many of you think that you open projects and don't get them complete. And I'm not saying you have to like focus on doing all of the laundry all at one time. And while it's waiting in the washer, like you don't do anything else until it's all finished, but just notice, kind of scan your life and see how might it serve you in the way you go about your daily life.
That would bring you more peace to be less scattered thinking about several things, kind of like, you know, on the stove at once. But what is it that you could just focus on? Get done. Move on to the next focus on, get done and move on to the next. And then you would finish and have accomplished, um, many more things than if you were trying to do 10 things at once.
So constraining, restores peace. Okay. Number six is something that you hear me talk about a lot. It's because this is where I battled, um, um, with my life. And I still do, you know, nothing that I'm offering you here today is something that I'm an expert at. So the sixth tip is to go after a B minus grade in the things that you are doing in your life.
We wanna be making progress in our life. Not going after perfection when I was. A perfectionist. I really held myself back and really it's just fear. It's just fear of not being perfect. Not maybe. And then you being judged, but when I opened up to this idea of B minus being actually the grade I'm after, instead of the, a plus everything lightened up for me, I felt so much relief.
And I got so much peace and a lot of that came from me also seeing how much I got done, how I was being successful in the things I was going after, because I was taking massive action. So back when I had it all wrong about perfection and believed that my drive for doing things perfectly brought me the achievements and pride.
I was afraid a lot of the time, but now as a recovered perfectionist and some days I'm still a recovering perfectionist, I don't let it stop me. And I have accomplished way more because of this small, but mighty concept of moving through my life and getting a B minus grade for the things that I'm doing.
This means, did I show up for my kids today? Would I get a B, right? This means did I clean up the house enough that I would get the grade of a, B minus before I sent that email out? Did I. Not have to spend so much time making all of the grammatical, you know, errors that I had. Perfect. And make it sound perfect.
Did I send it out? Would I get a B minus? Yes. And yes. And yes, then it is not only good enough for me. It is actually now the goal. Okay. Seven step seven of my piece. Restoring tips is to remind you. To get in the habit of coming back to the present moment. And this is, it takes a little concerted effort at first, but it's just a simple kind of phrase in your head that says to you, okay, what is actually going on right now?
That's it. We, a lot of times our mind wanders into the future, it goes into the past. And especially when it's thinking about the future, it's thinking that life is going to be better. When better there better when I have everything done better. When the kids are, you know, older, like it's just always, when your brain is thinking, it's gonna be better.
There you are missing out on all that is going on right now in your life. That is amazing. The only reason that we ever want something is for the feeling that we will have when we get it, when we achieve it, when we have it, when we reach it or we accomplish it. So we're after a feeling that is really what we're after with our goals.
So, because I teach you here that you. Are the one who creates your feelings from your thoughts. That means that you can access any feeling you want, including the ones you think you're gonna have when you reach your goals, you can access them right now. And so having the habit to ask this question, what's going on in my life right now, it can also be, how do I wanna feel?
Right. For instance, if you want to reach a goal, because it's something that you wanna prove to yourself and you think that when I reach it, I'll feel proud. I'm I'm all for having goals. Everybody. I want you to go after things. I just don't want you to be in the illusion that you need to delay your peace and feeling good about yourself and in this case proud till later when you, I know that if you bring yourself back to the present moment and think, what am I proud of myself right now?
What have I done that I am feeling can feel proud right now? and this habit brings you back to the present moment. And this is where peace resides, not in the past, not in the future at some later date, but right now. And I also, when we think about, , it, things not being better, then when we've reached something than it is right now, we also wanna remind ourselves.
Life will still be 50 50 at 125 pounds at a hundred thousand dollars in the bank account for me when I have that beach house one day. Right. But it's still, life will be 50 50 then. And so I want to concentrate on having peace and enjoying my life right now. The Danielle who doesn't have a beach house yet.
So get in the habit of coming back to your present moments as much as possible. Okay. Let's move on number eight. And I just alluded to this in number seven, but the number eight tip to restore your piece is to be conscious of the fact that peace is a feeling right balance. Is a feeling joy is a feeling.
So to have more of what you want is just a feeling away, which means it's just a thought away. So it comes with the thoughts. You think, if you are not thinking thoughts that make you feel peaceful, why not? What are you believing about your current situations? Um, what are get really clear on what your thoughts are about it and see, and question them come from that place of curiosity.
When you want to have more peace in your life, it will take curiosity and compassion that brings you the clarity. And then from there, you'll be, you know, you'll be inspired to either think a new thought or to go do something that actually helps you and brings you joy. This is what I think when I want calm.
And I want confidence. I have to remember that these are available to me at any time and they are created by me internally. So. Eighth piece restoring tip is to know and move towards believing by putting into practice, how you can access any feeling, including peace at any time. All right. How's everybody feeling so far?
We've got. Eight, we've have eight tips down and two to go, but can you see that? Even if you just focus on one or two of these, how life changing it can be for you. And that's what I would suggest. Right? Which one resonates with you? Which one you might say like, oh, I'm already doing matter. I've got that.
And then there are some that I'm bringing up that really, you, you might want to ask, like, would this be helpful to me to. Focusing on my ninth piece, restoring tip is to know that failure is not a bad thing that we actually want to rack up more fails. And that going after things that we would usually think as a total failure is actually winning.
That's right, because when we fail, it is telling us that we are living life. We are going after things, we are taking action. We're trying things out. We're going for it. Cuz people who fail a lot means that they are also learning a ton. And that when we, the more we learn, the more we win. So. I feel more peaceful because I no longer see me, like not getting something right.
Or trying something. And it's not working out as a failure, but I no longer make failure mean a bad thing. I always have a choice to see that failure means something about me person. Or I can just evaluate and learn from my fails. And then I am armed with information to do things differently next time.
So are you a mom who kind of says to yourself a lot, like I'm failing, if so, can you see how your piece would restore if you switched your perspective on failing and make it mean that you are just. Living a big life taking lots of action and going after things, I know that it does for me. And so I hope that helps.
Okay. Number 10, I alluded to this at the very opening of the podcast. , but number 10 is to always know that I am 100% worthy because of the fact that I exist. This restores my be immediately when I recall that I am a child of God, I'm a daughter of our heavenly father and that he created me and that I am a human being that is existing in the world on earth today.
And that in itself is the definition of being worthy a hundred percent. So there's no, there's no more worthiness that I can gain and I can't be less worthy. I just am. It's just complete my worthiness. So my peace restoring tip for you is to make the decision to once. And for all, never question your worthiness.
Your worthiness is 100% intact. And when you accept and embrace this truth, you then stop spending mental and emotional energy questioning it. And you can go about living your life, knowing that you're already enough. And so you don't have to do anything more to prove this. So relish in the piece that you are complete.
And from that place, then you can choose to grow and change in ways that you want ways that sound fun to you, but they're not in any false pursuit to feel good enough because mama, you already are all everyone. These are the 10 tips I have to restore your piece and I hope you enjoyed it. And I hope that you found it helpful.
And know that if you struggle with this area or if any of the tips you want to make, be a habit and be a part of who you are and you want extra help. I wanna invite you to come to one of my free peace strategy calls. And let me just tell you a little bit about the call. They are 30 minutes long. And what this means for you is that it is not a lot of time.
To get a lot of impact on your life because in 30 minutes, it, it can change everything for you. These calls we meet on zoom. Zoom used to be something that was foreign to a lot of people. But now with, , having gone through the pandemic, a lot of people know about zoom, but what this means for you is that you can have this call with me on your phone or PC.
I just had, , one of the free calls, strategy calls yesterday, and the mom shows up in, in their they're in their car. Right. And then I have some that are in their closet and I have some in their home office and with their kids on their lap. Right. We love this, um, software and technology that we have that we can meet any, anyone at any time at any place with, um, with our phone or computer.
And this call is free. So what this means for you is that it doesn't cost you a dime, right? It, again, it only cost you a little bit of your time to come seek some relief and, and get some peace and let's get a strategy for what works for you and your personal life. And you will get me, right. I am an expert coach.
I'm a certified life coach, and I also have an advanced certification in faith-based. And I have coached hundreds of moms, so I know how to help you. And lastly, before I wrap up this episode, I want you to know that coming to a free P strategy call, you will get focused on you, right? When is the last time you had somebody for less than an hour, but just it's all the attention is on you and focused on you.
And what this means for you is that you will be, have a specific time when, you know, for sure that that week you will have checked off that self care list, um, that you put it in, that you took care of yourself because coming to this call, getting this focus, it will up level your mental and emotional health.
All right. Just know that that is always available. When the time is right for you, I invite you to come meet me and I would be honored to help you in navigate this journey of motherhood. I will see you all next week, much peace and love to you all. Thank you for tuning into today's episode of the peaceful mind podcast.
Are you ready to take everything? I teach you here and put it to work for your own. To really learn how to have peace of mind, no matter what is happening around you. If so, I'd love to have you as a client, as your coach. This is where you'll get personal and focus time on your own mind using life coaching tools, concepts, and proven life, transforming wisdom all through a faith-filled lens to learn more about how we can work together.
Come on over to DanielleThienel.com. There you'll see how to sign up for a free coaching consult and learn how to get started until next time peace be with