[00:00:00] You are listening to episode 237 of the Peaceful Mind Podcast.
Welcome to the Peaceful Mind Podcast, a place for creating the peace of mind you need to be the best mom you were created by God to be. If you want to bring more balance, more joy, and more peace to your motherhood, this is the place for you. I'm your host, certified life coach at Catholic Mom, Danielle Thienel.
In the name of the Father, of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit, let's get started.
Well hello there and welcome to the Peaceful Mind Podcast. I'm Danielle. I'm your host and I'm so glad you're here. I'm so glad you're here for what we're going to talk about today, which is finding joy in those everyday moments when you are a busy mom, because [00:01:00] Mundane is what kind of happens a lot in this journey of motherhood.
So let's put it more towards the meaningful part so that we can see the joy that is going on in our everyday routines. I want to help you discover how to actively cultivate more joy in your life. And we're going to do that actually by focusing on what might be holding you back from truly having these moments of joy throughout your day, because as busy moms, our days often kind of blur together, right?
They're filled with tasks to do lists, responsibilities, and within that hustle and bustle, there lies some hidden gems. They're always there. It's kind of like Christ, right? Like he's always there. But He's not like [00:02:00] tapping us on a shoulder and saying, Hey, remember me like He's just there patiently waiting for us to call on Him.
And so in that kind of crazy chaos of our busy mom lives, there are beautiful moments. There are miracles. There are there's evidence of God's beautiful creation, and they're just kind of covered up. And so those moments of joy are waiting for you to be uncovered for you to uncover them. So let's explore how we can find these treasures, these treasures of joy more often, more consistently.
So these everyday moments can really be what is compounding and adding up for this underlining constant joy that we can carry with us. Okay. So what I [00:03:00] want to offer you today on how to do this, like I mentioned, takes us looking at what is not working. And the first one I want to bring to your attention is overcommitment.
Overcommitment is blocking your joy right now. We can't find these moments of miracles when we're overcommitted because it leaves no space for spontaneous joy to take place. It leaves no space for relaxation, which is where we can find a lot of joy these days. And overcommitment leads to burnout, which is the opposite of happiness joy, when it comes to being a busy mom.
So instead of being overcommited, I want to invite you to prioritize your tasks in a way that has you looking at what matters most to you at [00:04:00] this stage of motherhood and what is important for me in my life right now. And when you focus on what truly needs your attention each day, this is going to help reduce that overload of overcommitment.
And I want to invite you to have more joy by learning to say no more often. This also is vital. To eradicate any kind of overcommitment you might have in your life right now. Empower yourself to decline requests that do not align with your current priorities that we just talked about.
And remember, every time you say yes to something less important, it's less important. It's a no to something more important. So you want to be careful of how that works, right? So when you say no more often, then [00:05:00] you're actually saying yes to opportunities for more joy because you will be less likely to say no. Overcommitted.
The second one I want to point out is what robbed me of my joy for so long and for those crucial, wonderful, early parts of my motherhood because I didn't come to this, this coaching room these concepts and strategies that I offer you and what I gained through a life coach and I'll just be forever grateful for all that My coach and ongoing coaches continue to give me and that is to unwind Perfectionism this robbed me of so much joy this This always striving, never arriving, always thinking that I'll put off having joy until things are aligned perfectly.
And so for [00:06:00] you to find more joyful moments in your busy mom life, you're going to want to say to really unwind your perfectionism if that's something that you have found that takes place in your mental. And emotional life because perfectionism blocks joy. It blocks joy by creating unrealistic expectations in your life.
And it also creates disappointment when things inevitably fall short because they will. So I want to like kind of offer you today that if you find yourself not having as much joy and you're, when you hear me say it, you kind of align like, yeah, I think that's me, this perfectionism. Then can you begin today to set more realistic standards instead of aiming for perfection?
Can we aim for good enough? That [00:07:00] comes back to the B minus tool that I teach in my program. And I also as just a, like a side note, not to get off track, but I also introduced that concept of being minus in my book, The Cyclone Mom Method. And I will say that like these podcasts I know can be super helpful and I'm trying to, you know, transfer what I know absolutely works to help your busy mom life be more peaceful and joyful.
That book, The Cyclone Mom Method, if you haven't grabbed your copy today or download your version, that digital version that comes with a audio, go ahead and be sure to check that out at daniellethienel.com/book. So it's my name. com forward slash book and grab your copy today because everything that I offer here on the podcast You can find really all that foundational mindset coaching work in that book and what you're hearing me on, say, on the podcast stage is [00:08:00] really builds on that.
So again, I divert getting back you know, getting back to setting realistic standards and, , not embracing perfectionism. We want to embrace that good enough. That B minus is what we're doing. Would we give our great ourself a grade of B not B minus? Yeah. Well, awesome. Take that B minus that's good enough.
And then you move on to the next thing, right? And hopefully what we're moving on to is more. Joyful moments in our busy life. So adjust those standards to something more achievable and less stressful for you.
And along with this perfectionism or how this blocks your joy is that we're always after something like we never arrived to a finish line. And so what I want you to do is I want you to create more finish lines that you're crossing so that you can celebrate. [00:09:00] Those wins. So celebrate all the small wins. Make it a habit to recognize and celebrate the small achievement and progress. And this will shift your focus from what's missing or from the lack, like you're not at perfection or a hundred percent yet to what has been accomplished, what you did gain, what you did get done. And you want to celebrate, pat yourself on the back, give yourself a high five, wink at yourself in the mirror, right? Just enjoy a couple of nice deep breaths and celebrate those wins. So setting realistic standards and celebrating our small wins, that does help us overcome perfectionism, which then will have you finding way more moments of joy in your everyday life.
The next way to suggest that you find more joy in your [00:10:00] life is to put some focus on lessening your digital distraction and believe me when I'm offering this to you, I'm writing this down to be helpful. I'm taking my own advice without a doubt. I know I am missing out on some joys and missing out on having some really happy moments and really soaking in some of this life and being present because of being distracted digitally.
And so I know that I'm not alone in this. So that's why I'm offering this today as a way for you to find more joy in your everyday life. Because. Our joy is blocked by these devices because it is consuming our time and attention and it's disconnecting us from direct meaningful interactions. And I get that it might seem ironic that I'm saying this when probably most of you are listening to [00:11:00] this on a podcast app on your phone.
But I just want you to bring more consciousness and attention to seeing that if you're somebody who wants more joy in your life as you're busy, then lessening your digital distractions is probably something that you're going to want to make happen for yourself. So I just really have found it helpful to designate specific tech times for when I check my emails or social media or watch TV.
And I have to overcome this, any desire urges or how hard my brain wants me to, to seek pleasure this way. And I have to stick to these times so that I can avoid constant distractions, but it really is possible mamas. You can do hard things and I want to be able to offer to know that I'm, I'm here to help you with that.
If that is something that [00:12:00] you feel could help bring more joy to your life, that's exactly what we talk about with my clients inside my program. When we are wanting more time, when we're wanting to be able to feel better and have more joy, this is definitely one of them. Some other. ways that you were able to increase our joy is to establish certain areas in our home where there's no electronic devices allowed.
Maybe that's bedrooms, maybe that's a kitchen table, dining room, you know, where when you're eating and whatever works for your family or you, you know, always suggesting we start with ourselves and we'd be an example for our family. It's just going to encourage more face to face interactions. And I believe that in itself is already going to lead to more joy in your life.
So another way I want you to be able to have more joy [00:13:00] is to be on to yourself, whether you're someone who. Is in a chronic state of stress, okay, keeping our mind and our body in a state of tension. It clouds our perception of the positive aspects that are definitely happening in our life. We just, they're clouded over when we carry along this chronic stress, right?
So where I think. is the best place to replace chronic stress with peace of mind is by doing the work on your mind that's necessary to retrain your brain that affects your emotional state. So this is where coaching for sure comes in and makes the biggest impact. So regular practice that has you taking a look at your mental [00:14:00] health and enhances your overall emotional resilience, which this is exactly what coaching does.
And even for a few minutes daily for yourself is going to make a significant difference if you are being more mindful, more conscious. And when you're someone who's learning and understanding more of how your mind works and how you can utilize your thoughts. thoughts to, to help you overcome any kind of chronic stress.
Then when this happens, you're going to increase your joy. One of the physical ways you can get started on this today is just to engage in regular exercise. It is without a doubt, proven exercises to reduce the stress hormones and it releases endorphins. It improves your mood, it clears your mind. And so maybe this is why you're listening to this podcast today to have [00:15:00] this gentle reminder to engage in more regular physical activity and that will help reduce chronic stress and therefore increase your joy.
And then I just touched on this, but I want to just break this out and make this be like the final roadblock that if you focus on overcoming, you will find more joy in your life. And that is to overcome a negative mindset, a negative mindset blocks joy. Because when you focus on the negative and failures and in the gaps and where you're falling short, this.
Will spiral you into a habit of this kind of thinking. And then the thinking is where, where we're more, we're more confused or ungrateful or we're more of [00:16:00] a victim, right? When we practice a negative mindset. So Like I mentioned before, the greatest strategy is to learn how your brain actually works and what it takes on a regular basis to get you to somebody where your default is a positive mindset.
And again, we're not going into like number three that I offered perfectionism. Yeah, we're going to, this life is hard. We're going to have negative things happen and we're going to have some negative, you know, kind of thoughts and reactions to it. However, if you just hear this and know you're a person who, who has practiced a really long time being a negative mindset, then this for sure, I want to say, jump on a call with me and see if coaching at this time is something that is a really great fit for you.
On our own, in [00:17:00] general, I have found that gratitude journaling has been an amazing way to keep myself in a positive mindset. I also read books books that directly have a focus or a theme to helping you look at the bright side and see the positive and, and ways to become happier.
Obviously prayer, positive affirmations, meditations on scriptures, things like that. This helps replace your negative thoughts with positive ones, which then shift your outlook. And so a negative mindset could be what is definitely keeping you from finding the joys in your life every day. And so as a recap, if you're someone who wants to find more joy, And in just the everyday daily life as a [00:18:00] busy mom, then you are going to want to make sure that you are staying away from being number one, overcommitted, number two, perfectionism, number three, digital distraction, number four, chronic stress, and number five, a negative mindset.
And so implementing the strategies I've offered that counteract these five things that are robbing you of your joy, and you do so on a consistent basis, it's going to help you overcome these common blocks and it's going to enable you to find more joy in the everyday moments as a busy mom. Okay. I hope, tell me which one was, which one do you think you want to concentrate on?
Go ahead and email me, let me know what you thought of this episode. And if you know somebody else who could benefit [00:19:00] and have more joy in their life and they're a busy mom, maybe they're overwhelmed, send them and share the podcast. This is the greatest way you can be a partner with me in my mission to help other moms feel more peace, balance, and joy in their life.
Okay, everyone. Thanks again for visiting and being with me today, and I'm looking forward to next week's podcast and until then, peace be with you always.
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