[00:00:00] You are listening to episode 255 of the Peaceful Mind Podcast.
Welcome to the Peaceful Mind Podcast, a place for creating the peace of mind you need to be the best mom you were created by God to be. If you want to bring more balance, more joy, and more peace to your motherhood, this is the place for you. I'm your host, Certified Life Coach and Catholic Mom, Danielle Thienel.
In the name of the Father, of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit, let's get started. Hello, beautiful mamas and dear listeners. You are going to get an Encore episode this week. When I'm releasing it, it is the week after Christmas and I am taking a well deserved vacation and break. And I'm going to be with my family, my daughters are home from college.
And I'm so excited to just have this family time to rest and rejuvenate so that I can come back with you in the new year. And I've [00:01:00] decided to give you an encore episode that I think is going to be most useful to you all right now. And it was episode 150, the elimination diet for peaceful living. So. I am still helping my clients today, try and help them use this quote diet to, to help them have more peace of mind.
So I hope you enjoy this Encore episode. And again, one last reminder at the beginning here. And that if you're interested at all in grabbing one of the seats, if they're still available, they are when I'm recording this podcast, but they might not be when it releases. You can just go to the page of daniellethienel.com/health because when this comes out, we are just days away of Healthier program to get more benefits. Physically healthy and raise our wellbeing around our physical health this new year. So go check that out at daniellethienel.com/health and [00:02:00] enjoy this Encore episode.
Hello, and welcome back to the podcast episode 150. I just can't believe it's 150 episodes. Now, if you've been around a while, then you know that within the library of the episodes, there are a variety of topics to help you moms manage and uplevel and focus and just really bring an injection of peace and balance and joy to your busy mom lives.
And I would like to invite you to just indulge with me for a while. As I ask you that if it has impacted your life in a positive way, would you share it? I know that I love when others think of me and share something when they're like, I really think that this is something that you would like. And they bring into my consciousness, something that I didn't even know existed.
And a lot of times that has been [00:03:00] something that's been really life changing for me. There was a time when somebody shared me a podcast that got me into life coaching, then into certification and doing what I'm doing right now. And if she wouldn't have shared that, then, then who knows? So I just want to ask and just know that I thank you in advance.
But if you feel called to share this podcast with someone else, then that would be amazing. Okay. So here we are at the end of the year, we're about to begin another year. And this particular time, we find ourselves when we are. Looking ahead to the new year and making some plans. This is when we make resolutions and goals for the new year are being set.
And this is why I chose today's episode topic that I am calling the elimination diet for peaceful living because going along with [00:04:00] that resolution and goal time, this is when a lot of people do think about going on. A diet of some kind. We want to make a resolution to stop doing a certain habit, maybe like eliminate sugar from our diets or even where we want to eliminate something in our daily life.
Let's say we bite our nails or I don't know something, right? That's usually not good for us. And we can really relate when we talk about shedding weight. There's just some. Decision that we want to make for the new year that we think will better ourselves and that will help us have a stop doing things that we would deem as like a bad habit or just want to change and don't want the same result.
And I would like to offer that I have a different elimination diet that I want you to consider taking on to your [00:05:00] life this next year. Again. I'm only offering you something that perhaps you might want to just try, just experiment with, just gain some more awareness around. Because I believe if you do follow this diet and eliminate these certain things I'm going to talk about from your life, you will drastically Increase your peace and joy.
You will have so much more peace of mind and you will be so much more enjoying your experience of your human life here while we are on earth, where it's not guaranteed to be smooth all the time. And where we won't run into things that we weren't expecting or issues and struggles and some challenges and knowing that right now we are in the planning stage of the next [00:06:00] year.
I just want to shed light that knowing that the changes that you want and the new goals you want to achieve require us to work on our minds and our emotions, and that be a focus. And this will be why you will feel supported. And have the accountability you need. If you are giving time and attention to what's going on in your mind and your emotions, that's what will be the greatest help to you to achieve those goals that you want to have.
So here is the elimination diet that I want to invite you to take on in the new year. And that would be that you would eliminate three things from your daily life. Now, before I tell you them, I want to hone in on this word eliminate. Okay, so I looked up the definition and [00:07:00] eliminate means completely remove or get rid of something.
It also means to exclude someone or something. And, and exclude them from your consideration, okay? I am using the word eliminate because I think it will help you better understand that what I'm asking is that if you stop doing these things altogether, you will benefit greatly.
But I also really talk to you here. about letting go the need of doing something perfectly. And so I want to offer that completely removing these things from your life isn't really the ultimate goal. What I would rather you think of it is, is I want to stop and I want to, remove these from my life. Remember our coaching concept and tool that I named B minus where instead of going after perfection, we want [00:08:00] to like make B minus be the good enough grade that we go.
And that the reason is because nothing will ever be perfect. And we don't want to stay in this kind of like action of striving all the time. And we want to get results. And we want to just know that we're human and not perfect. So I'm calling it the elimination diet, but I want you to know that when I offer you the three things, I do still want you to aim for B plus.
You might not completely get to remove them a hundred percent and that's okay. If you aimed for 80 and even 50 percent, remove this for your life. 40%? You are still going to reap great benefits. Okay, so here are the three things that I invite you to eliminate. The first one is THINKING. Criticism, the second one is complaining, and the third one is confusion.
So let's start with the first one, criticism. To criticize is when we [00:09:00] indicate to someone or something their faults, and we do this in a disapproving way. You might not realize how much you are self critical, or maybe you do recognize it, and you see this is something that you want to, like. Lesson at or eliminate altogether.
I just want you to know that the reason why you would want to do this. Is what will make it something that becomes something you're committed to, or that will be long lasting, right? What benefit do we get when we indicate the faults of others? When we disapprove and vocalize that to ourselves, how does that serve you?
What is the upside? Because really what's happening is that when you criticize yourself, you are just layering on more thoughts. And more judgment and building more evidence against yourself of why you [00:10:00] are that thing or why you can't improve or why something's wrong or broken or needs fixing about yourself.
You have this place you want to go and then you maybe take some action and it doesn't go your way. And so then we decide we want to beat ourselves up and we think that that's going to help the situation when we get more critical of ourselves. Are we, are we believing that that's what's then going to motivate us to change?
I then want you to think about if you're criticizing someone else, you're pointing out all of their faults, right? And it's being done in a disapproving way. I want you to notice that you are doing that because you have some thoughts about the person. And then maybe those thoughts are creating negative emotion, which then propels you to take the action of criticizing them.
[00:11:00] But when you do that, how do you feel and what do you create from the action, from taking the action of criticizing them? I would put money down that it's not a result that's positive and really something that you want. But here's the thing. The reason behind it, why you would criticize some, someone else is because you want to feel better, but it really does the opposite.
It causes you to have more thoughts that increase your level of emotion, of negative emotion. And the person that is receiving the criticism, they also, and this is something, if you're someone who you are not the person who gives criticism, but you're on the receiving end of criticism, I just want you to know that.
Where that fits in your model, if you feel bad, when someone criticizes you, is it because of what they say? It's always how you feel. It's always going to be created by what you [00:12:00] think about what they say. And if you can remember this, then you will know That you have a choice every time to feel any way you want about anything or anyone and no matter what they say or do.
So imagine your life next year if you decided on purpose that I was going to lessen greatly Or remove altogether the action of criticizing myself or someone else. And then even if you have awareness that you are, you're going to pivot. Or maybe you can recognize that you're in the middle of criticizing and then you stop yourself.
I would just, I would just like you to take on the notion that this would be something really important and life changing for you. So, if you had more awareness. Accepted your power to start or stop doing something, and then the next step of adjusting, catching [00:13:00] yourself, saying something different instead of criticizing, focusing on something nice to say and kind to say.
And I mean that very much for both what you say to yourself and others. Okay. Okay. The second thing I want to invite you in order to. Live a more peaceful life is for you to eliminate complaining. Complaining is when you express dissatisfaction or an annoyance about something. And it's also, complaining is also when you state, it's a state that one is suffering from.
So if you have a complaint, right, you might have a symptom or an illness, there, there's some kind of like suffering from pain. Okay, but mostly what I want to hone in on is that it's an expression of dissatisfaction or annoyance. And I want to, I want to hold onto that. And firm the [00:14:00] focus on the word express.
So what that's telling me is like you, you can have a thought of complaining, like, I don't like that. She should change. Things should be different. That's not right. You can have that thought. But what I want you to eliminate is the expression of it, which means you actually take it to the place of saying it out loud.
Or, again, telling someone. This complain and criticize, it's, it's really, it's a little bit similar, right? And it can have some overlap, but I'm trying to separate it in your mind to see that there are times when it is, it is different. We can complain just to complain, right? You can complain and say this apple isn't ripe, but that's not really like, you're not saying, criticizing, like.
Oh, the, the store shouldn't sell an apple like [00:15:00] this. There's a little bit of difference. And so are you somebody who complains a lot? Are you someone who complains like 50 percent medium? You would, you would say, yeah, I do it kind of like in the middle. I just, Again, why it literally is just a habit that has been formed where you take your thoughts that are negative about something and then you express them.
So it's the expressing. One that I want to say, Can we stop ourselves? Can we not express it? Because we know that putting complaints out in the world, putting negativity out in the world isn't something that you want to do. And even if you put a complaint out in the world, but then afterwards, you notice.
You're like, Oh man, I was really just focusing on the negative there and really expressing it and telling everyone, [00:16:00] talking about it and stuff like that. And it just doesn't feel good. And I, I mean, that is, that's okay. We're human. I would like you to try to have more awareness around it to be like, you know, I want to lessen the negative.
Being a complainer. I want to eliminate complaints altogether. I just want it to be more of this experiment where you're like, what if I just couldn't complain anymore? As much as my brain offered me a complaint, I just couldn't say it out loud anymore. How would my life be different? What would change?
And this is the Kind of the attitude I would love for you to take on if you want to live more peacefully. Okay. The third one is one that I do talk about a lot here on the podcast. And that is confusion, okay? Confusion is a feeling, and it's defined as a lack of understanding, [00:17:00] uncertainty. It's the state of being bewildered or unclear in one's mind about something.
When we model out what's happening in your creating in your life with the feeling of confusion with confusion going on the feeling line of the model and for any of my new listeners, it's the awareness tool that I use coaching and I've I've talked a lot about it here on the podcast. What I always will know is that the result that someone gets is going to have it be.
Almost exactly what they have always, where they've always been, because confusion is a feeling that doesn't spark action. And so without action, you can't get a different result. So we believe that we lack understanding and then we also feel uncertain, but really what we are is we're just [00:18:00] unclear about what we want to decide to do.
Or we're unclear about how we want to think about this or feel about it. And confusion feels terrible and uncomfortable in our body, but it just keeps you stuck in your life. And I want to offer, with the Elimination Diet, That what if you decided you could never be confused ever again? Did you know that that was even an option for you?
That you literally could just answer the question, if I wasn't confused about this, what would I do? What would I pick? What would I decide? And then, whatever your answer is to yourself, you then do that thing. It can be as simple as this. And after coaching countless moms, this is what I find to be true.
Whenever you're thinking the thought, I don't know how. And then dot, dot, dot, whatever comes after that, it [00:19:00] oftentimes creates the feeling of confusion. It's that thought that keeps us stuck. That notion that you don't know or don't have the answer. And perhaps you then want to go do some research and ask some other people.
That is fine. I get that. We want to gain some knowledge, right? But actually acting on knowledge? This is what takes us out of confusion. I recently went to a life coaching event and this is how the life coach named and mentioned this, this in between confusion state. You're over here with a desire of wanting something and.
Instead of making a decision on what to do next, we stay in this state of confusion, thinking and believing the thought, I don't know how to do it, or I don't know which one is the right one, or I don't know which one is the best one. And I love how she [00:20:00] described this in between state of confusion. She described it as the miserable maybe so you have this desire on one end and then making a decision Will take you out of confusion, but in the middle you are in this pit that she calls the miserable Maybe I've said before that Whenever we think maybe that it keeps us stuck, whenever we think, I don't know, I'm not sure, I don't understand, I wonder why this is happening, and then this personal favorite came up recently with a client where it was like, yeah, for just for some reason, blah, blah, blah.
For some reason, I don't understand why this is happening. For some reason, this is happening. And I always want to come back and say, let's not be confused. Let's not choose confusion. If you had to choose right now, what you believe is the reason for this [00:21:00] happening, what would you say? And so, I want to empower you to be onto yourself and then to decide you're no longer going to let confusion be why you don't go after your dream life, why you don't go after the changes you want, why you don't go after making peace a priority.
Because peace comes when you're not in confusion. It comes when you make decisions and get moving. Taking action. So let's just think about this for a moment. I want you to step into the you of the future for a moment. Let's go to your future self. And you are someone who doesn't criticize yourself or others.
It's just not who you are. It's not the thoughts that you think, and it's not the actions that you take of criticizing. Okay. [00:22:00] Then let's say you're a person who doesn't complain. So you don't express your dissatisfaction or you don't express your annoyance. Okay. Let's just picture. That if you're not complaining, then you're either owning your own results, you're owning your part in something, or you find what in concentrate on what is good about the situation instead of what you don't like about it, or you're a person who Instead of expressing dissatisfaction, you actually, you, you take control and take action on what you can do to change it.
And then let's think of ourselves as if we were never confused. That we never even allowed ourself to say the phrase, I don't know. If that was not a thought that was that you could, that you were capable of thinking, who would you be? [00:23:00] And I can tell you, who you would be is someone who just picked, who decided, who chose, who acted.
That is what then propels you forward if you are not confused anymore. So, That is what I would like to say could be the most weight shedding diet available, because we are shedding mental pounds when we eliminate and remove, or, you know, could give ourselves a B minus, criticism, complaining, and confusion for our life.
And I do know. Everything that I offer on this podcast that I try and communicate it in the most simple way to help you understand it and to apply it to your life. And I hope that you are finding that [00:24:00] that is working for your life. And as always, I want to remind you. And if you're someone who wants the next step, deeper dive into the, the help and support and accountability to eliminate these things from your life, I have a process and I have a, a toolbox full of tools and concepts that once you know and apply.
To your specific life areas, everything changes for the better. And if you want help knowing those things and having the support and accountability, then I am here and would love to talk to you. But if you are listening to this podcast right when it comes out, I want to wish you all a wonderful new year.
And I'm so excited for what can [00:25:00] come. And the piece that you can experience if you take on my challenge to do a mental elimination, a mental diet of criticism, complaining, and confusion. And if you are someone who takes this on, I would love to hear how it goes. So you can always email me or find me and message me on Instagram.
All the information on how to get in contact with me is always in the show notes for you to find. Okay, everyone, I will see you and talk to you again next year. Thank you so much for tuning in to today's episode of the Peaceful Mind Podcast. If you found value in today's episode, I'd be so grateful if you could subscribe and leave a review.
It not only supports the podcast, but ensures you don't miss out on future episodes packed with insights and tools to create peace of mind in your [00:26:00] busy mom life. And if you're of the Catholic faith, like me or any Christian mom seeking to feel better in any area of your life. And to show up more calm, connected, and confident, I can help.
Become an empowered mom who knows how to bring about the changes you desire, no matter the circumstances. Whether you need one on one guidance to get there, prefer a group coaching program with like minded women. Or a self study course, I've got you covered. Explore my private one on one packages, join my Busy to Balanced group life coaching program, or delve into my signature course, Divine Time.
To find out which path is right for you, let's meet and see what's the best fit. Schedule a free call with me at daniellethienel.com or send me a direct message on Facebook or Instagram @daniellethienelcoaching. And also don't forget to get your copy of my book, The Cyclone Mom Method, How to Call On Your God-Given [00:27:00] Power to Remain Calm, In Control, and Confident as a Busy Mom.
Dive into the digital and bonus audio version. When you go to book.daniellethienel.com/new-book you'll find all the details in the show notes too, until next time, peace be with you always.
