Episode 280 Transcript
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[00:00:00] Hello and welcome back to the podcast Beautiful Mamas. I'm so glad you're here. We are already knee deep in summer, aren't we? If you are listening to this, when the episode comes out, the temperatures are rising, the kids are home, and maybe you're feeling a bit overwhelmed. If your summer isn't quite living up to those perfect Instagram expectations, you're not alone.
But here's the good news. It's not too late to reclaim your summer, and that's where I come in today. Whether you're feeling frazzled, overscheduled, or just plain tired. Today we're talking about how you can regroup and create a summer sanity plan because summer should refresh your family. It shouldn't deplete you.
Okay. We've all been there, right? We're seeing other families on their epic road trips. We're seeing these perfect kind of patriotic desserts or having those magical beach days, right? [00:01:00] Where somehow the sand doesn't get anywhere or everywhere. Are we seeing those? Meanwhile, you might be thinking, I'm just trying to survive over here until bedtime, while working from home with kids who are screaming in the background.
I hope that a lot of you listeners, will be able to create sanity and have those wonderful family moments. But let me assure you that it's completely normal if your summer isn't picture perfect. And more importantly, it's not too late to shift gears. To create a summer experience that actually works for your family.
So let's start by getting clear on what your family truly needs this summer. Remember, it doesn't matter what has happened up until today, right? Or what you had planned happening. Let's use today, and when you're listening to this as a regroup, right? We don't want to listen to what Pinterest says you need [00:02:00] or what your neighbor is doing, and not even what you did last year, I want you to answer the question, what does your family need right now in this specific time?
This starts with an honest assessment, right? Of everyone's current state. Are your kids coming off an intense school year? Do they need downtime? Are you burned out from work or needing restoration?
Is your family craving an adventure after feeling cooped up? The mismatch between expectations and your reality is really where stress, summer stress is born. And your thoughts might sound something like this, we should be doing something special every day. Or good moms create magical summers full of activities, or everyone else seems to have it all figured out.
But I want to invite you today to replace those thoughts with something more helpful. How about my family needs [00:03:00] a mix of rest and activity that works best for us, or being a good mom means knowing what my family needs right now, or no one has it all figured out and that's okay. So instead of setting specific goals, like we're gonna visit 10 museums, we're gonna read 20 books, try setting intentions like we're gonna prioritize our outdoor time whenever possible, or we're gonna find ways to connect as a family that doesn't exhaust everyone.
Many moms can relate to our planning ambitions when we set out for our summer activities, only to find that, everyone's melting down by day three, right? And then our brain is oh boy, do I have, weeks more of this. Think about the last time you tried to pack too much into a day, right?
Then the rushed breakfast happens, the traffic to whatever attraction or [00:04:00] place you're going to. Then there's like overpriced snacks. There's sunburns. The meltdowns, right? I know that's not the memory that you're hoping to create. So a truly refreshing summer, it really needs to have only several key elements in balance.
First, there's true rest, right? Not even just physical rest, but mental and emotional space. So this might look like your mornings where no one sets an alarm, or an afternoon where there's unstructured playtime. And you might be thinking, but if I don't plan activities, my kids will just stare at screens all day.
We can just set out, trying to shift this to something like some unstructured time will allow for creativity to flourish and at the same time, I can still set reasonable boundaries around screen time. Then there's this meaningful memory making. That [00:05:00] we want, but we want it without exhaustion.
Because the truth is kids often really remember the simple moments more than the elaborate ones, right? That could look like an impromptu backyard water balloon fight, right? And that might create so much more lasting joy than the expensive theme park trip. And I think that maintaining necessary routines is also crucial, but I know that's my thought and belief but you want to just either open yourself up to that, or maybe it's something that doesn't feel aligned with you and that's okay too.
Perhaps your children survive and thrive with more predictability. Even in the summer, maybe bedtimes do shift later, but keeping some type of consistent rhythm helps everyone know what more to expect. And finally, summer can include like natural learning and [00:06:00] growth. It doesn't have to mean you need formal lessons or a total many weeks of camp, but rather embracing the unique learning opportunities that summer can only provide for you.
Maybe that's a stargazing, maybe that's gardening. Maybe that's the neighborhood lemonade stands. And I also want to just, back up to say, camps are wonderful too. It was very much a part of my summers with my children.
Let's see right now, if you want to just stop, revise, make new decisions about creating what I've labeled my summer sanity plan, right? Even if you're starting like halfway through or I. It's still going well. Just taking this time to just do a little evaluation. This episode is just giving you a reminder if you're not feeling sane about summer, let's help move you more towards that.
So first I want you to try like a [00:07:00] simplified bucket list approach, right? Rather than a big overwhelming list of must dos. Create a short list of a few experiences that your family hopes to have. Maybe you could post it somewhere so everyone can see it and it's really visible. Maybe you do a little celebration dance when you check one off.
Next, I want to offer that maybe you consider implementing a basic weekly rhythm, maybe rather than planning out every single moment, maybe Mondays or home days for catching up on rest. Maybe Tuesdays might be water days, whether that's your community pool or sprinkler in the backyard or Yep. Even those water balloons I mentioned.
How about Wednesdays? Could be friends days where you go to a friend's house or you invite one over. This kind of rhythm, it really creates enough structure that will prevent that, ah, what are we doing today? Like expansiveness [00:08:00] abyss is what I used to call it. That you maybe get that question a lot during the day and it'll just allow with some more flexibility.
And I want you to really maybe just use this episode as a reminder to be more intentional, right? Maybe about certain things that you're seeing don't go so well. Maybe that's like transitions between activities. That might be that you decide, hey, I'm gonna build in a little bit 15 minutes of quiet time before we head out somewhere.
Or having my mind's just going to a space analogy right now, like a reentry routine when coming home from, outings or vacations, right? Something like that. And don't forget to have those buffer days in there. If you are going, yeah. We need days inevitable, unexpected situations that arise because they will.
Because despite it being summer, we still are living this human life where circumstances are [00:09:00] coming in and out of our life all the time. Ones that we want and a lot that we don't want. And many moms I've seen make the mistake of just scheduling something for every day and leaving no margin for like when life happens.
So I really do want you all to have what you would define as the best summer plans. But even those best plans, they face challenges, right? The pool closes unexpectedly due to maintenance, or the weather doesn't cooperate with your plans. Someone is going to get sick. Maybe if you work outside the home, your work deadline collides with something you promised your kids to do, like regarding a special outing.
And when these disruptions happen. Your brain wants to go to, this is ruining our summer, or I'm failing at giving my kids a good experience. But instead we can keep our sanity by choosing thoughts like this is one day in the whole [00:10:00] summer, or flexibility is actually teaching my children an important life skill.
We can always have a few backup plans ready, right? For these common scenarios. You also want to have a list of indoor activities that is on call for rainy days. I want to invite you to have easy meals for when you're too tired and just simple outings, right? Maybe when bigger plans fall through.
So please don't forget to take care of yourself through it all Mamas. You can't pour from an empty cup. Your summer needs moments that fill you up too. So whether you want to wake up 30 minutes before the kids, whether you want to make quiet prayer time, something that is just non-negotiable for you, maybe you want that solo target run.
You have an arrangement with another mom for occasional kid swaps, right? So you can each get some alone time. I don't want you to [00:11:00] forget that this is your summer too. All right? Remember, friends, the goal of summer isn't to create perfection. It's to create peace. It's not about checking off every possible summer activity. It's about being present in the moments that matter.
And it's not too late to shift your summer experience if it's not going well, or it doesn't have the sanity that you want. So whenever you're listening to this, maybe you're listening to it in August, maybe you're listening to it in the middle of winter, you can still grab some of the themes and points that I'm offering you today to implement these ideas and finish strong in whatever season you're in.
So that's what I have for you this week. Thank you so much for listening. And if this episode felt like it was a blessing to you, would you take a moment to share it with a friend who might need it too? Who wants to regain her own sanity? Okay. And remember to join me at my website.
Website is [00:12:00] daniellethienel.com. Instagram is @daniellethienelcoaching. Email me, that's [email protected] Ways to connect with me. If you want my help right now with life coaching and my offerings, just check out the show notes. It's got everything that you will need to do to have access to some resources and to get in touch with me.
Alright, everyone, have a beautiful week. I will talk to you again soon. And until then, may peace be with you always.
