Episode 293 Transcript
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[00:00:00] You are listening to episode 293 of the Peaceful Mind Podcast.
Welcome to the Peaceful Mind Podcast, a place for creating the peace of mind. You need to be the best mom. You are created by God to be. If you wanna bring more balance, more joy, and more peace to your motherhood, this is the place for you. I'm your host, certified life coach at Catholic Mom Danielle Thienel.
In the name of the Father of the Son and of the Holy Spirit. Let's get started.
Hello, beautiful mamas. Thank you so much for joining me this week. I'm your host, Danielle Thienel. I'm so glad you're here with me today because today we're gonna talk about letting go of the hustle and embracing your calm and not because it's the right way to go. Instead [00:01:00] only you know what is personally a goal or not, right?
But for simply offering you a different perspective and also a path forward, if you find that right now in your life, you don't like what being busy and hustling is bringing to your life. So with all these episodes, I'm here to offer you a perspective that I think and believe. Is a way for you to get what I hear moms want and what I know I wanted which is to get out of overwhelm, busyness, hustle, and to figure out how to have a beautiful balance and one that is full of more calm and peace, right?
So if some of you to be busy and it is working for you and hustling and doing all the things is not. You honestly can assess and it's not disrupting your life, then keep it. [00:02:00] I still hope that you'll find something helpful from this episode. But if you are just someone right now who just feels like, and I describe it as a swirl, who just feels like you are just caught up every day in the swirl of life and don't feel grounded or anchored, and don't feel calm and in control and confident about how you're moving forward.
Then this is the place that you want to be listening today's podcast. And I also would not be serving you to the best of my ability if I didn't let you know and offer to you my own personal solution to this busyness and hustle. And instead, we'll have you embracing the calm that is absolutely available to you no matter what your life circumstances are right now.
And that is my signature life coaching process called the Cyclone Mom Method. And all of my one-on-one private coaching clients and members of my [00:03:00] group coaching program that is called Busy to Balanced. You get access to this method, and the reason I wanna preface this before we dive into the episode is to let you know as I tell you, how to let go of the hustle and embrace the calm.
It's because you are the peace that you desire to have so badly that I hear from all of you and that I wanted so badly myself for yourself, and your family, right? It needs to start with replacing the hustle and busyness. With the peace. And the way we do that is we first learn how to cultivate that in your own heart and that is what working with me will ensure will happen.
So as always, come find out if it's a fit, sign up for one of my free calls. There will be a, there's always links in the show notes to how to connect with me and we will. If you're somebody who wants to let go of the hustle and embrace the [00:04:00] calm inside my coaching program could be exactly where you need to be right now.
Okay. For this episode, let's start by naming what actual hustle and like the culture of busy and Hustle has taught us. It's told us that busyness equals importance. It's also told, taught us that exhaustion is like a badge of honor, and that if we're not constantly doing something, we're somehow failing.
We're somehow not good enough in motherhood. This shows up as the belief that good moms are always available, always giving, always putting everyone else's needs before their own. But here's the truth that hustle culture doesn't want you to know, and that is that your children do not need a busy mom.
They need and desire and want a peaceful mom. [00:05:00] They don't need a mom who can juggle 17 things at once. They need a mom who can be fully present for the things that matter most. And that's one thing I always try and help you to decipher between those things our brain tells us are important and we should do.
But really there's only a few things within our families that matter most. And Jesus himself showed us, shows us a different way, and we are always wanting to move to be more Christ-like right in Luke 10, when Martha is distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. Jesus gently. Tells her that Mary has chosen what is better and it will not be taken away from her.
He says, Mary chose presence over productivity. She chose connection over busyness, and Jesus affirmed her choice [00:06:00] and I know personally. I literally just was in the habit and was going high achiever, and really built up this perfectionist mindset and really a, a. Collected the thought beliefs and patterns.
That, and belief system that all the things I was producing all the time, that was connected to me being good, like good at life, good at motherhood, good at existing, right? But that was surely thought errors. A belief system full of errors because once motherhood came and several children came, it definitely unraveled real fast.
And the overwhelm, the stress, the not being the mom I wanted to be right. Showing up harsh and yes, yelling and just really [00:07:00] going to places because that. That were not fun at all. And it wasn't until I learned right that busyness wasn't a badge of honor. And when I really started embracing some of the things I'm gonna talk to you about today, that is when, ugh, this new kind of control and confidence and calm came over me.
The hustle culture, it lies, it tells us that our value comes from what we do. And if you right now, there is no, there should be no blame and no shame If you find yourself and say, yeah, that's me. I really do connect my value with the things I do. I get it. You're not alone. This is a ton of people out there, but.
God's Truth tells us that our value comes from who we are. Simply because we are human and [00:08:00] we exist. You are a hundred percent valuable, which doesn't mean that you can add to that or subtract to that by the things you do. You don't have to earn love through performance. You don't have to prove your worth through productivity.
You are already enough exactly as you are, and some of you need to hear that today. So I'm so glad that I can be here to remind you. Now, let me clarify what I mean by embracing your calm, wanting you to embrace your calm, because I'm not talking about like just sitting on the couch eating bombon while your children run wild.
Calm. It isn't the present absence of activity. It's peace in the midst of activity. Okay, let me say that again. So I'm not asking you to stop doing everything right. Just be like to find a calm that doesn't have any activity. We need [00:09:00] activity, right? We are living our lives, but we do wanna become somebody that in the midst of it, that we can create peace for ourselves.
So along the journey, there's peace. So this is what a calm mama. Is it's one who moves through their day with more intention rather than reactivity. A calm mama makes decisions from a place of peace rather than pressure. A calm mom responds to challenges with more grace for herself and others, and rather in a panic mode.
A calm mom creates margin in her life like it is built in on the regular rest and reflection. A calm mom says no oftentimes to good things so that she can say yes [00:10:00] to the best things. For her and her family and a calm mama prioritizes being more often over doing. And lastly, I wanna point out a calm mama models for her children, what it looks like to live from peace instead of anxiety with those around you.
Describe you as being peaceful more most of the time, or anxious most of the time. It's just interesting to stop and pause and just contemplate that for a moment, right? Because being calm is not a luxury. It's a necessity. Your health needs it, your relationships need it. Your children's emotional wellbeing depend on your ability to model and cultivate that inner calm in your household.
And there are costs. There are costs to [00:11:00] constantly being busy and having constant hustle. Let's acknowledge that it is costing you like being in the present moment more often. And I hear this from you moms all the time when I'm helping you. Uncover what you really want, and this comes up the phrase, I wanna be more present with my family, right?
But when you're always rushing to the next thing, you miss the beautiful moments right in front of you. Your child's laugh the way the afternoon light falls across your kitchen table. The sweet things your toddler says that you'll want to remember. It's costing you your peace. Constant hustle is.
Constant motion creates like constant kind of body buzzing sometimes we do label that as anxiety. And when your body is always in go mode, right? You're like your nervous system never gets a chance to rest, it never gets a [00:12:00] chance to restore. And I don't just mean. Rest like at night, at sleep. That's a given that we were humanly made.
I am talking about in the wake hours it is costing you constant hustle. Your relationships. Hurried love isn't the same as intentional love. And when you're always distracted by what's next, you can't really fully connect with what's going on in that relationship. Now it could be costing you your health.
Chronic stress from constant busyness affects everything. What do they call it? They call stress the silent killer. Your sleep, your digestion, your immune system, your ability to think clearly, right? Those are all affected by hustle and by busyness. It's costing sometimes your children's sense of security because their thoughts about you.
Are what [00:13:00] create their security and they feel safest when they can see that their mom is calm and grounded. And so they have thoughts of that create them feeling secure more often. When they see that and when you're constantly stressed and hurried, that energy is out there and they absorb it, they take it on, and then they often act out in response accordingly to that.
So let's just, contemplate that. Where I just want you to take that question and say, is that what's happening in my life now? Would I label that I'm hustling, that I'm busy all the time? And if so, again, that's okay. That happens. It's just my offer to you today on this episode is for you to ask [00:14:00] yourself, am I ready to make a change?
Yes. It'll be hard, right? Yes, it will require some time and energy or focus, but what might be this beautiful discovery on the other side? And if your answer is yes, I do want to go down the path of letting go of hustle and embracing more calm. Let's just talk about what, like some tangible action steps that might look like.
First of all, you cannot embrace calm while saying yes to everything. It's, that's just the truth bomb right there. Okay. Mic drop. You cannot say yes to everything. I call it the sacred no, right? The sa, and I want you to practice it. And what it is, it's your permission to protect [00:15:00] your peace by being super selective about your commitments.
So before saying yes to anything, a volunteer opportunity, a social event, even again. Things that your brain will tell you are good things. I want you to ask yourself, does this align with my priorities right now? Will this bring peace or stress to my family? Am I saying yes from obligation or from joy?
That's the stopping and asking those three, four power this powerful questions to direct your brain so you can evaluate. That is a very tangible thing you can do to let go of the hustle. Okay? I also want you to know that hustle culture tells us to pack every moment full of activity, but calm requires what we describe sometimes as white space.[00:16:00]
That's like building margins into your schedule. We have no problem taking an open schedule and filling it up this, but one of the tactics I was taught in my coaching program when it came to. Not hustling was actually writing in my rest periods first, like my downtime, my, my calm activities, my rejuvenating activities, my self-care activities, right?
Putting that in your schedule first. Have you ever even thought about that? Building margins into your schedule, buffering time between activities. Hello. How many of us write things that are just back to back to back, right where we have the ability to deliberately put in a buffer time and schedule quiet moments in your day.
How about we can label, this is just my space for the [00:17:00] unexpected. Because if you're constantly running five minutes late, you're not being efficient, you're living in chronic stress, and you wanna give yourself the gift of arriving five minutes early instead, and use that extra time to breathe, pray, center yourself.
So create margin in your day. Another tactical way is instead of trying to control every moment of your day with rigid schedule. How can you create what let's see where we could call them. Just like gentle rhythms, right? We have those things like morning, our kind of, we call 'em morning routines, evening routines, but think about it, our morning rhythm, our afternoon rhythm or evening rhythm.
That kind of flow a little bit more with your family's natural needs. This would give you structure without the stress of trying to stick to unrealistic timelines. And I know I don't have it all right here in front of me, but I know that I have done a podcast [00:18:00] about morning routines and evening routines.
So if you were to just Google both of those, or I can have it in the show notes, links to those, so you might wanna like. Rethink a new kind of calm rhythm. How to work that in to these kind of patterns that we have in our day instead of making it a rigid schedule every time.
Because rhythm allows for flexibility, right? While still providing you that predictability that you want and your children need. And embracing just rhythms. They'll help you move through your day with intention rather than the busyness and the hustle. And one of the greatest gifts you can give your children is showing them that rest isn't laziness.
That taking time for yourself isn't selfish. Jesus regularly withdrew to quiet places to pray and [00:19:00] recharge. Rest is not optional. It's essential for your spiritual wellbeing, your emotional wellbeing, your physical health, and when your children see you, taking time to rest, to read, to pray, to simply be they learn that their worth isn't tied to their product productivity either.
It's like you don't even realize it, but you are giving them permission to be human rather than human doings, right? Being human beings rather than human doings. When I talk about this. Kind of strategy to go, I can't help but think about this beautiful family that grew up with me on the street that I lived on.
They were a large Catholic family. It was seven kids. But, and we I just thinking about summertime, we played, we are in and out of everybody's house, but on the regular, their mom napped during the day and now again. If you have a whole, several little littles. I understand this may not [00:20:00] pertain, I remember she did have, older kids who could look after little kids.
But I just as I, that just came to my mind as thinking about. Her running the household and seven kids. And yeah, it was just something we learned and know oh, it's mom's taking her nap time. And who knows? Who knows if she was sleeping, if she was working on a hobby or if she was just laying down, just escaping, who knows?
But back then it was like, oh, she's taking a nap right now. Alright, so everyone, I wanted to pop in and give you an invitation to more calm in your life today. So I hope that I've given you permission to figure out how to let go of the hustle in your life. I wanna give you permission to move more slowly, permission to do less, so that you can be more present for what you do.
I wanna give you permission to rest without guilt, [00:21:00] and I really wanna give you permission to prioritize your peace over productivity. This isn't about becoming lazy or like someone who's uncaring about your daily responsibilities, right? If you're saying, but Danielle, I have all these responsibilities.
I want it to be yes, and. I can care about my responsibilities, take care of them, and I can let go of the hustle and embrace more calm in my life. Again, it is about recognizing that you're a human being. We must keep reminding ourself over and over again and the way that I talk about this and to say, you're a human being.
You are not a robot Mama. I have a whole chapter of it in my Divine Time Solution book. In my Divine Time Management course, you are not a robot, right? Your worth is, it comes from God. It does not come from your [00:22:00] to-do list and your children, you know all the things you want for them. This is one way to. To influence those things, more likely calling being, coming to them, the calm, if you want them to be more calm, it's to embrace your own calm.
Not just for their sake, but for yours, right? This sacred word of mo work of motherhood, like we have been provided everything we need. Including the need for rest, for peace, for calm. So this week I challenge you to choose one area where you can let go of the hustle.
Maybe it, it is in that morning routine. Maybe it's saying no to one commitment that's causing you stress. Maybe it's simply sitting down for five minutes in the afternoon without feeling guilty about it, right? And again, what the ultimate. Path that I think will [00:23:00] help you let go of the hustle, embrace calm would be to join me in life coaching so you can transform and change your life to one where when somebody asks you what your top feelings are, they will be.
Balance, joy, peace, calm, control, confidence. If that sounds lovely to you, then please sign up for a call and let's talk about what it would look like to work together. Alright, beautiful Mamas, I hope that you will let go of the hustle and embrace the calm. And if you know of another mom who you think could use some uplifting so just share it. Just send her over the link to this episode. Alright, and until next week, I wish peace to be with you always. Thank you so much for tuning in to today's episode of the Peaceful Mind Podcast. If you [00:24:00] found value in today's episode, I'd be so grateful if you could subscribe and leave a review.
It not only supports the podcast, but ensures you don't miss out on future episodes packed with insights and tools. To create peace of mind in your busy mom life. And if you're of the Catholic faith, like me or any Christian mom seeking to feel better in any area of your life and to show up more calm, connected, and confident, I can help become an empowered mom who knows how to bring about the changes you desire, no matter the circumstances.
Whether you need one-on-one guidance to get there, prefer a group coaching program with like-minded women. Or a self-study course I've got you covered. Explore my private one-on-one packages. Join my busy to balance group life coaching program or delve into my signature course. Divine time. To find out which path is right for you, let's meet and see what's the best fit.
Schedule a free call with me at [00:25:00] daniellethienel.com or send me a direct message on Facebook or Instagram @daniellethienelcoaching. And also don't forget to get your copy of my book, the Cyclone Mom Method: How to Call on Your God-Given Power to Remain Calm, In Control, and Confident as a Busy Mom. Dive into the digital and bonus audio version when you go to book.daniellethienel.com/new-book.
You'll find all the details in the show notes too. Until next time, peace be with you always.
