Ep 321 - 5 Ways to Truly Enjoy Your Life (May 2026)
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[00:00:00] Hello, sweet mama. I'm so glad you are here today. If you are someone who is overwhelmed and can't remember the last time you would say, I'm happy, then I'm so glad you are here. I want to help you start enjoying your life again. I wanna talk to you. About the part of you that feels like you're doing all the right things, checking off all the boxes, caring for your family, showing up for your responsibilities, and yet deep down you're not really enjoying your life.
Maybe you feel like a kind of a constant hum of pressure. Maybe you're just playing tired. And joy feels like something for someone who [00:01:00] has more time, more energy, and definitely for someone with fewer responsibilities. Or maybe you're just trying to be grateful, like you look around, you know you're blessed.
But if you were truly being honest with yourself, you're going through the motions and wondering, is this really it? If any of that rings true, I want you to know this episode is for you because I believe one of the greatest gifts you can give your family is a mama who enjoys her life, who doesn't just survive her days, but you can say you live them fully.
This is someone who walks in her purpose and finds joy. Not in the perfection, but sometimes finds it despite the mess [00:02:00] that it might be. And I truly have given some thought before I turned on the record, of my microphone. It's, I, remember being here. And I am talking to anyone who's listening on the other end, no matter what your stage of motherhood or current circumstances are that you're facing, we can enjoy life.
And if you were to ask most people. What the purpose of life is, they'd probably say something like, to be happy to enjoy life. And yet so many of us are not enjoying it, especially in the midst of motherhood. [00:03:00] And it's not because you're doing something wrong and it's because the world we live in, it's constantly sending us messages that tell us that we're not quite there yet, that we.
Have this way to go, this more to go. And most of us, and I fall into, I fall victim of this many a times that we tie our enjoyment to the outcomes. Like when the house is clean, when we finally catch up on laundry, when the kids behave, when the schedule finally slows down. But guess what? That finish line keeps on moving.
Have you noticed, have you really leaned into the fact now? The way that I like to describe this, which has to do with the method in my coaching called the Cyclone Mom method, is I see it as a cyclone that is never stopping. It's always going to be a [00:04:00] swirl and. It also can be described as you continually think When something happens, then I'll be happy, then I'll enjoy my life.
But that finish line keeps moving, and so because it keeps moving, I'm here to help remind you and invite you to stop looking for the finish line and start looking. At how you can move forward towards creating the result of I am enjoying my life today. On top of that, our brain, yep. I'm gonna talk about that beautiful human brain of ours.
It isn't wired to help you enjoy the moment it's wired to help you survive. To scan for danger, to anticipate problems, to conserve your energy and avoid [00:05:00] pain. So between our culture telling us that we're not enough yet, and your brain trying to keep you safe and comfortable, no wonder joy feels elusive.
But mama there is another way. Enjoying your life isn't about waiting for circumstances to change. It's about learning to be fully present and practicing the skills that allow joy to grow, even right in the middle of your real messy, ordinary days. And today, I wanna offer you five powerful shifts that will help you begin to do just that.
So let's walk through five powerful mindset and lifestyle shifts that will help you stop chasing joy like a finish line and start having you truly enjoy your life right now, right where you are. [00:06:00] And these aren't just quote nice ideas. They're things I've lived, they're things I've coached women through.
And I have seen them transform lives. All right, let's jump in. Number one, let go of unrealistic expectations. So many of us were trying to enjoy our lives while. Simultaneously holding ourselves to an impossible standard. We expect ourselves to be productive, to be patient, to be joyful, to be organized, and to be on time and all at once.
And when we fall short, we then beat ourselves up. No wonder our life feels stuck, unrealistic. Expectations are the number one joy killer. And they convince you that happiness lives on the other side of [00:07:00] doing more, being better, or finally getting it right. And if you've been around long enough, you've heard me remind you.
This is like a mentality of expectations that maybe a robot could fulfill. But you are not a robot. You are a human being. Mama real life is not a Pinterest board. Though I love me a Pinterest board, I'm just gonna say right now I'm, I had one for my, dream life and goals, and I'm looking at it on the regular, but real life, it's loud, it's unpredictable, it's full of spilled milk and sibling fights.
And when you lower the bar to human. That's the only place you can make space for joy. A peaceful mom knows [00:08:00] that good enough is enough and good enough to determine what that is. I like to provide my tool called B minus. If you literally can think of completing. To-do list items in a way that you would give yourself a grade somewhere between 70 and 80, like a B minus grade.
That can start to be your definition of enough and just watch how more joy comes into your life when you are somebody who, lets go of this unrealistic expectation and just know you are the one creating those expectations for yourself. So you are the one who can change them. That is just the beautiful gift that sometimes we forget that we were given.
Alright, number two, [00:09:00] stop trying so hard to be happy and this one might surprise you. 'cause really the more we chase happiness directly, the more we try to force ourselves to feel good and. The more it then seems to slip away or be elusive to us. And that's because real joy comes not from trying to be happy, but by choosing a.
And from being present with what's going on around you right now, so that you can choose different thoughts and make, give different meaning to the things that are happening in your life right now. So trying too hard to feel good actually takes us out of our lives. 'cause this is when we compare, this is when we hustle, we micromanage and [00:10:00] we look for proof.
We're doing it wrong. But here's what I tell my clients. You don't have to force happiness. You just have to stop resisting your life, right? Joy is often what shows up when we stop fighting the hard moments and we step fully into the reality and what is actually happening, and we start embracing. The realness of it and our choices with when we're met with these certain circumstances, it's not resisting what's happening.
It's leaning in and saying, Nope, this is what's happening. This is what I've been presented with. Now what? Now what am I going to choose to think, feel, and do about it? And sometimes it won't be happy, but sometimes it will. Sometimes [00:11:00] it's a different flavor of a positive emotion. That's way better than the current negative one that you're giving yourself of heavy and pressure and defeated and disappointed.
So ironically, you'll be become happier when you stop trying so hard.
Okay, number three. Learn to be with negative emotions. This has been a major theme in some of the, previous podcasts of this year. It's huge. That's why I keep talking about it right there. I, did an episode. Look it up. It's called The Power of Feeling, your Feelings. So circle back to that one. Because one of the reasons we don't actually enjoy our life is that we're afraid to feel anything [00:12:00] uncomfortable.
We will numb ourselves. We will avoid negative emotions at all costs. We will scroll so that we check out. We will shop to get a dopamine hit. We will snack. We try to stay upbeat. that's like slapping on that positive toxicity, right? But when we push away our real emotions, we also push away our ability to fully feel joy.
Mama, the key to enjoying your life more is not to eliminate sadness or stress. It's to build the capacity to hold all of it when it shows up to realize what it is, and to be able to have the skillset. The knowhow to move through it, not to keep you stuck in it. So [00:13:00] when you stop fighting your feelings and you start welcoming them, and all of them, even the hard ones, you become someone who can experience life really deeply, fully beautifully.
This is where peace is found. Learning how to actually feel your feelings or just be with negative emotions when they're there. Number four, make time for what feeds you guys. Time is a mental construct. Okay? We all have the 24 hours. This how we make time. Is how is we decide, we make decisions and know that we're always gonna be missing out on stuff.
[00:14:00] Always. Because again, there comes that we're only human. We're not a robot. We only have 24 hours. And that there's so much to experience, but we just, it's impossible, physically impossible to do it all. So I am suggesting if you want more joy in your life, make time for the activities, the things of what feeds you.
And let's be honest, most of us are not great at giving ourselves what we actually need, right? If I'm telling you, you all, you need more self-care, what will your brain say? We're not giving ourselves the things we actually need. We convince ourselves that a manicure or an Amazon order is enough self-care, but then we could be still yelling at the kids or feeling completely drained.
That is a clue. You cannot enjoy your life when you're constantly [00:15:00] pouring from an empty cup. It's just a formula. It just doesn't work. True self-care, it's not indulgent. It. It's what fills you back up. And if you've gone through a string of emotionally heavy seasons or if you've just been in survival mode, it might take more than just one bath or one walk to get you back to a baseline.
I want, I talk about it, I've done a podcast about it. Extreme self-care, as I often talk about it. It's how you become a mom who can respond instead of react. It's the key. I want you to be a mom who can say, that's okay. Who can hear? mama. Without snapping because you feel full, not depleted.
Alright, number [00:16:00] five, stop waiting for life to slow down. This is a hard truth. One we all need to be reminded of and to hear So with love, I do have so much compassion for your brain who wants to hurry up? But if you want to start enjoying your life to the fullest, not waiting,
then stop waiting for life to slow down. The season that you're in right now actually is your life okay? Not the one after the house is clean, not the one after the next milestone happens. Not the one when everything calms down, not the one future, one you hope to have and not the one you've already had.
It's right now your life is happening. So if [00:17:00] you're constantly telling yourself, I'll enjoy my life when you. Always will be waiting. You'll always be wanting joy instead of experiencing it, instead practicing. This is the life I get to enjoy today, and that shift alone can change everything. And the truth is, the most joyful moms I know aren't the ones with perfect schedules or easy kids or neat homes.
They're the ones who have decided to enjoy their life in the middle of the mess. And I emphasize the word decided. It's a choice. What are you choosing to feel about your life right now? And here's just a couple like. Additional truths I want you to remember as you're learning to enjoy your life or deciding [00:18:00] from now on, I'm gonna enjoy my life.
If you really wanna start living more fully, keep these in mind. They're small but powerful shifts in your perspective that will help like root and anchor everything that we just talked about. Okay. Here's one. You don't have to earn your joy, okay? You don't have to wait until you've checked off your to-do list.
You don't have to fix your flaws first or get your life all together to enjoy it. Joy doesn't have to be deserved. It can simply be received. You are allowed to experience peace right now in the middle of everything that's still unresolved. I give you permission. Another thing I want you to remember is happiness isn't something you achieve.
It's something you allow.
Okay? If you're always trying to [00:19:00] manufacture good feelings by being more positive, getting more done, or trying to control everything, you will exhaust yourself. I know I've been there. Those are totally traits of a perfectionist. Instead, let Joy be something that comes to you when you stop trying so hard, right?
One of my earlier steps. Let yourself be surprised by the goodness in your ordinary life. I literally just came back from an errand to pick up a prescription, and I stopped and noticed the amazing clouds. It brought me so much joy.
Stop overthinking too, what it means to live fully. I know I, and I've probably said it and I probably have a podcast about living fully right, but we sometimes think that truly enjoying life has to look like something, like a big trip or perfect routines, or an Instagram worthy moment, [00:20:00] but real joy. It comes in the small, quiet places, sipping coffee on the porch, dancing in the kitchen, laughing at your child's joke, choosing rest over guilt.
That is so part of living fully. Don't miss those joys that are already here because you are thinking that you're looking for something bigger or something shinier that will fulfill the definition of living my life fully.
And here's just a last thought too. And that is that discomfort or pain in your life doesn't mean that you're doing life wrong, right? I, tell this to my clients all the time, feeling discomfort doesn't, like nothing's gone wrong, right? In fact, it often shows up. [00:21:00] to tell you that you're growing or stepping into, a new version of yourself, or you're taking on like a goal.
When, you're learning to stay with yourself in the hard moments, instead of numbing out or pushing it away, there's gonna be uncomfortableness, right? When life feels hard, you're not broken. There's, it's just the humanness, it's the human experience. Sometimes it indicates that something like, breakthrough or you're on the edge of something beautiful that's about to happen when things are hard, and that's what I want you to then look at, be looking after, looking for.
Okay. Those are my five ways that I wanted to offer you today to really start truly enjoying your life. And then a few other things to keep in mind. Again, I know God does not want [00:22:00] you to just get by and survive. He wants you to enjoy it this very moment, not later. The where you are right now, whether that's messy and perfect, maybe even a little overwhelming, it's still part of the gift of your life and don't wait for the kids to grow up.
Don't wait for the to-do list to be done, and don't wait for your circumstances to change before you start truly living it. And let me just add to that for sure. Don't wait for other people to change or other people to do certain things that they're not right now so that you can then enjoy it.
We are not promised tomorrow. But we do all have today, and there is abundant joy to create right now. Whatever stage of [00:23:00] motherhood you're in, whatever life has dealt you, whatever your current season looks like, and let's be real here. Joy doesn't just show up and plop down on your lap. It does. It takes intention, it takes focus.
It takes action, and that's okay because it's so worth it and you've done it before. You can do it again and again, and if you've been trying to get there on your own and you feel like you keep spinning your wheels or you're just stuck in patterns that aren't serving you anymore and, you just want some help and support, come, let me help you.
The way you do that is to sign up for a free, peaceful mom strategy call. The link is always right there in the show notes whenever it's right for you. Okay, and if you all have loved this guidance from today's episode, I would totally appreciate, [00:24:00] you passing it along to another mama who might need it.
Okay? Alright, because mama, I want you to know joy isn't just a nice idea. It's a way of living, and I want that for you. God wants that for you. I am so glad you came. Listened to this episode today. I hope you found it helpful and serving to your life and motherhood, and I'll be back next week with you again with another episode of the Peaceful Mind Podcast.
Until then, may peace be with you always.
