The Peaceful Mind Podcast-Episode 94- Best Friend or Bully Brain?
You are listening to episode 94 of the peaceful mind podcast.
Welcome to the peaceful mind podcast, a place for creating the peace of mind. You need to be the best mom you were created by God to be. If you want to bring more balance, more joy and more peace to your motherhood, this is the place for you. I'm your host certified life coach at Catholic mom, Danielle Thienel. In the name of the father of the son and of the holy spirit.
Let's get started.
Hi, everyone. I am going to do a little something different this week. Right now, when I am recording this podcast, I'm actually also recording the video of me recording this podcast. Well, one, I thought, let me see if I can watch my self-talk. Kind of think like I'm talking to you another mom, that that would be helpful.
Cause right now I haven't had any video on. And when I've been talking on the podcast, I literally am visualizing and thinking about you, one particular mom, who's out there and needs to hear what I have to say. And so I'm going to try something. I'm maybe I'll do something with this video as well. Maybe I'll post it, turn it into something that I put on my Instagram account, which is @DanielleThienelcoaching.
If you're not following me there, go over and do that now. So I don't know. Maybe I'll put it in an email and we'll just see, but I'm going to record this and do a video recording of, of me talking on this podcast. Maybe some behind the scenes aspects. Would interest you, but let's go ahead and jump into today's episode.
I want to talk to you today about your brain. I'm really always talking to you about your brain, but today and specifically, I want you to actually visualize yours. And I want to ask you, if you had to tell me if your brain was noted to you as. Best friend, like you have a really good relationship with your brain, or if you would label your brain.
A bully and knowing, and having a distinct fuel, um, understanding of whether your brain is one or the other is going to be so helpful for you to come back to a place of peace. If in, when. You are not feeling great. So we're going to talk about some examples of when your brain is acting like your best friend and when it's acting like a bully and just know that there probably are going to be times in your life that it's going to be both or that it lives in one of them a lot longer.
Before it packs up at stuff and, and moves and hangs out with the other one. But when you have this awareness about what your brain is saying to you, You can then step into your own power to adjust and change it. So I'll want you to kind of define here on the episode, as you're thinking about when I'm talking, what would your best friend brain be saying to you?
And if your brain was being a bully, what would it be saying to you? And why would you want to be in. One of them and not the other, because I'm not even saying that when your brain is being a bully, that it's always going to be a negative thing. Or sometimes when we're, you know, talking with our best friend, they are not giving us like really what we may be need.
They're giving us what we want to hear, but either way, I think you're going to find out that. We more than not want you to be in the best friend brain. So let's talk about each of them. Think right now, who is your best friend, picture her or him, and think about your times together. Think about the conversations that you have in the good times.
Like, think about all the fun things that you do to get. But then also think about when things haven't been so great for your life and then your best friend was there for you. And so it's different types of conversations, right? So with our best friends, we talk about everything. And for the most part, you would definitely say that you're very supportive of each other.
You have things in common and you like each other. And when you are sad or upset, You want to help make them feel better and comfort them in both cases where you're together, having a great time, you have certain conversation types. And then when you're not, when you're not at your best or things, aren't going well, and you have your best friend to help you.
It's a whole different type of conversation, but needless to say your. If it's acting like your best friend would be, it would be saying kind things and lifting you up and showing you what you might not be able to see in that moment. It's telling you things like you're amazing. I love you. You're so funny.
You're so cool to hang out with, Hey, do you want to plan on doing this? That sounds like it could be exciting, but it's a little, it could be a little scary too, but we'll be together. We'll have each other and I always have your back. If someone else steps in, you know that you can always count on me. Call me anytime night or day.
I'm here for you. I love you. You mean the world to me, I'm so grateful for you. I, I just am so thrilled that we have each other. Now on a personal note, I'll tell you that my own best friend passed away. It's been about a year and a half. Now. Her name is. And I can rely on my memories right. Of all the amazing fun times we had since we were friends from the age of three and.
Even though she's not here anymore. Even when I'm down, I still call and think, what would she say to me? And so I bring that up to say that you don't even have to have your best friend right next to you to call, to send your brain out and to call and say, what would my best friend say to me if she was here right now?
And then you also do have all of the thoughts and the memories that in probably experiences that you've had together so that you can see when your brain is being that way. When your brain is offering you thinking patterns and thoughts that you would define as conversations that best friends would have for each other.
This is where I want you to live most of the time. Where you are feeling supported and accountable and uplifted and inspired and happy because of the way your brain is offering you. Thoughts is just like your best friend. So even just say like, am I having best friend brain right now? Am I in best friend mode?
Because just by asking that question will help your brain go then realizing if it's not that it could call on some of those things that you would say to each other as best friends or recall in that moment. And you'll instantly feel better. Mama. Okay. Now let's just dive into the opposite, right? So we all can picture what a bully is.
We can picture that. Just like pushing you along, antagonizing you, pointing out all of your faults, like just making themselves feel better and really putting you down. And so those thoughts would, would be stuffed, like, come on. Are you really going to be like that? You're not as cool as me. You need to stop doing that.
And then it would just show up all your flaws, right? You need to become better. You're not doing a good enough job. You're a loser. We all know that their words are mean and unkind. And when you are being bullied, the brain in that moment is trying to seek harm is trying to intimidate you and coerce you into something that is not for your greatest.
And I know way too many moms out here who have a bully brain most of the time. And you think things like I'm not good enough. I'm not doing a good enough job. I'm a bad mom. I'll never figure it out. Why can't I ever get it right. I try so hard, but, um, I'm always failing in, in this part of my life, in this part of my life, in this part of my life.
And I, myself am not exempt from this because this is what brains do. Sometimes brains are bullies. And I just wanted for you today to have the awareness, to become more conscious of whether you are operating from, if you're fueled by. If your feelings align with a brain that is being your best friend and offering you thoughts as a best friend would, or if your brain was offering thoughts of a bully and.
You know, I mentioned earlier about how, like a bully brain, isn't always like a bad thing. And what I meant by that was like, for instance, if you really want to, you know, accomplish something, you might need, um, a brain that would be more on the, like, let's go, come on, you can do it. So it, it isn't even like the bully brain.
It's actually, it's the cheerleader brain. It's the coach. I just know that sometimes even the best friend would be like gentle to you when you actually do need more of a push. So you're not, um, holding yourself back by fear or anything like that. So for the most part, I want you to be in the best friend brain and understand that the bully brain is the negative.
Way of talking to yourself, it is full of self criticism and it lacks self compassion and self love. And we find compassion and love from our best. And most of the times that is what we way need more of in our lives. Okay. So I hope that's given you some things to think about. And again, my, my job here is to help you become more conscious of when this is happening in your life.
And that first step is amazing. So this week, just if you can bring some awareness to whether you are. In a best friend brain or in a bully brain and keep the best friend brain when you notice that's happening. And then if you find yourself in a bully brain, can you then adjust? Because when you do, I promise you, you will start seeing more results in your life that you want and that you love.
And this is why we dive into your mind. This is what coaching does. It challenges you to create thoughts that will serve your highest good, which is what I want for all that. And if you want my personal help in order to transform into your favorite version of yourself, I am here and would love to speak to you further about your personal circumstances.
In the show notes, you can find out how to sign up for a free call with me and we can dive deeper. Into if you're naturally in a bully yourself brain, let's get you on the path to the best friend brain and let that be what is more naturally driving you in your life? Okay everyone. That's what I have for you this week.
Thank you so much for joining me. Please share this podcast with anyone who you think would benefit from hearing it and go ahead and rate and review at apple podcasts. I would appreciate that so much. I love you all. I'll talk to you again next week. Thank you for tuning into today's episode of the peaceful mind podcast.
Are you ready to take everything? I teach you here and put it to work for your own life. To really learn how to have peace of mind, no matter what is happening around you. If so, I'd love to have you as a client, as your coach. This is where you'll get personal and focus time on your own mind using life coaching tools, concepts, and proven life, transforming wisdom all through a faith-filled lens to learn more about how we can work together.
Come on over to DanielleThienel. Com. There you'll see how to sign up for a free coaching consult and learn how to get started until next time. Peace be with you always.