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Stop Being Mean To Yourself

When I think about kindness, I automatically go to the opposite notion- MEAN

Why?

Probably because I live in Nashville, listen to Taylor Swift a lot and love her catchy song "Mean" where she really socks it to her ex through lyrics.  Ha! 

But Catholic mamas, kindness is kind of a big deal.  Sometimes we can forget that.  

And I don't mean showing kindness, as presented by google -the quality of being friendly, generous, and considerate-to others.

That already comes naturally in your vocation as a mom and as you mother your children everyday from near or afar. 

I want to remind you today about showing the Fruit of the Spirit of kindness to YOURSELF!

Jesus showed great kindness to sinners.

He shows great kindness to you and me every single day.

So, today decide to draw the line on shaming yourself or being mean to yourself but instead strive for greater kindness in your heart for yourself.

  • Be kind to yourself after you yell at the...
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Develop Your Patience Muscle

 The first time I became pregnant,  it took my husband and I over a year of trying, 

I recall feeling impatient the whole time.

When it finally happened, the doctor then said "It's twins!" 

After I boo hooed with joy, I recall thinking, "Well, that was totally worth the wait!"

God's timing was yet again perfect.    

But there was so much wasted energy on my part worrying, fretting and fuming that it wasn't happening soon enough. 

If only I could have saved myself all the upset and been patient and peaceful along the way instead. Relate?

That's the funny thing about patience, we don't get to know the end result of what it is we are wanting to have or where we are wanting to go until after we are patient (or impatient) to get it. 

Having patience along the way may not be the easiest way to be when we face the challenges of our human lives today, but it's a worthy endeavor, nonetheless, to seek this virtue.

I know being a mom has...

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How to Have Peace of Mind Now

This week's fruit of the spirit is my jam!

This is what I live to maintain myself and teach my clients and my family (if only they'd listen to me !) everyday- to have peace in the midst of this crazy awesome life.

For a long time I truly believed I would feel peace when

  • the laundry was put away and the house was all cleaned up
  • my bank account reached a certain number
  • after I lost 5 lbs. and got a hold of my sugar addiction. 
  • I was on vacation and not driving the kids around to all their activities

However, what I have comme to know for sure is that peace is generated internally from our own chosen thoughts, not caused by something outside of ourselves.

So, you have access to it at anytime! And this is such good news!

While we do feel peace at times when a goal is achieved or once you get a chance to sit at the ocean, that type of peace will always be fleeting.

Christ, is the only source of everlasting peace.

Therefore, when your thinking is turned to Him and you regular...

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Where to Go to Find Joy

If you are anything like me right now, it's been a challenge to muster up some true joy when navigating the world's current events.

But just like how the Saints had uncompromisable joy in times of trial, difficulty and pain, I'd like to invite you to deliberately seek out the next Fruit of the Spirit.- JOY! 

My grandmother was once interviewed for the local newspaper in her hometown. I don't recall why, but I do remember a statement she was quoted as saying- "You make your own happiness."

What I have come to know, and coach others on, is exactly what my grandma was saying too- Joy comes from within and that's where we need to go to find it. 

Because we know "within" is also where we find the Holy Spirit abiding, it's the perfect place to look when we aren't feeling joy. 

As an exercise, I invite you to first welcome the Holy Spirit's guidance into your mind and then ask yourself:

  • What could I think about and ponder, right now, that brings me the feeling of joy?
  • ...
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What the World Needs Now

I am so glad to be talking about the Fruits of the Spirit this week and the coming weeks. It seems fitting, especially as our nation faces such difficult times.

This is where I know to go when I feel like I don't have the answers- The Holy Spirit.

So we perfectly start with what our world needs more of right now, the first fruit of the spirit-

Love!

it can end up being the easiest feeling and at the same time, the most complicated in any given moment. 

Such is the roller coaster of our human existence and motherhood too, if that is your current vocation!

Here is what I want to share with you simply today. 

To love someone, including yourself, is a choice that you make and redecide to make, everyday!

You get to choose love in any and all situations, no matter what has taken place, or was said, or what you wished had been done or said. 

In fact, it is always the best choice.  Choose Love.

Jesus taught us to LOVE the Lord God and our neighbor with all our hearts,...

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How to Attain the Fruits of the Spirit

When I wanted to become a mother, I dreamed of how it would be. 

I saw myself as loving, sweet, attentive and trustworthy.

Though that was the case a lot of the time, I found that it wasn't as much as I had dreamed of.

Stress, overwhelm, and exhaustion led to disconnect, depletion and frustration which caused me to act in the opposite direction of how I had dreamt. 

 Shortly after a particular memorable "mommy yelling episode" when I lost my cool and I failed again at attempting to hold it together, 

I began being diligent with my prayers asking for the Fruits of the Spirit. 

I knew these gifts were ones that Mary, an inspiration for all mothers to look to, had set an example of these qualities.  I aspired to possess them as well.

Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness and Self-Control. 

I am by no means perfect at them now or for every aspect of my motherhood, but I do exude them more often now. 

I also use...

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How to Start the Day Off Right

 Every morning before my feet hit the carpeted floor of my bedroom, 

I have two prayers i say between myself and God, in the quiet of my heart.

I purposely choose to make a habit of saying them first thing in the morning before I get started on a busy day.

This "start of everyday" habit came from my exhaustion of trying to do things on my own and the deep desire to have God be the true leader of my life. 

Making it a habit to say them first thing, required building the habit with commitment.

Once you start it truly becomes a simple and tangible way to let God know you want his direction and control over your life. 

For I believe he can do a way better job than I can.

The prayers are simple, practical and best of all powerful,and I offer them here for you,

Because perhaps a desire to trust God more with the everyday aspects of your life is there in your heart just like it was in mine.

I refer to them as- The Please and Thank You Prayers:

Lord, please...

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Turning A Pause Into Purpose

Mothers, by nature are great multitaskers.

I used to think this was a strength to add to a resume- I have great multitasking skills!

I'd find pride in keeping a lot of things going at once, and most of the time I'd feel like I was doing it well.

Sometimes though, I'd overestimate my abilities and underestimate my limits.

I'd pack my life with too much. 

I could easily get my life and my schedule so packed to the brim that I'd find myself trying to rush all the time.

Then I'd get annoyed and frustrated with myself and other people around me because I had taken on too much.

Though on a smaller level than our current world pandemic and stay at home situation,

a few years back, I was given a chance to take a pause in my life.

I was forced to have a slowed down pace and it brought a wildly different perspective on my life.

I took stock. I evaluated priorities, daily routines, and current commitments.

What happened for me is what I want to offer all of you: 

The call to...

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How to Hold On When God Says Not Yet

Twenty years ago, my husband and I were looking to buy our first home.

After searching for and visiting what seemed like over 100 homes, we thought we found THE perfect house for us. 

I was so excited!

It had everything we thought would be perfect for beginning our new married life and I prayed hard for the deal to go through. 

Instead, we were outbid by another couple and didn't get the house we wanted so much. 

God said "Not now. Not this one."

This whole process happened again with what we believed to be another "perfect" home.

I was so disappointed. God had said "No, not this one." AGAIN. 

Was God sleeping on the job? Didn't he care that I really wanted this house? How could this one not be His plan for me?  Afterall, they would have been perfect. 

But it wasn't long before another opportunity presented itself.

It was a better home, in a better neighborhood, with a better price.

We got that house and 20 years later, our first home, is still the...

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How To Get Unstuck

Last week, I had a really big decision to make.

I told myself I didn’t know what to do and I felt confused.  It felt awful.

To try and hurry out of this awful way of feeling, I polled my husband and friends and looked on the internet for answers on what to do.

Both my daughter and a client shared with me as I was looking for my answer that they too, were struggling with their own big decision. 

They felt stuck and wanted to feel relief as well. 

Trying to get unstuck had us going to each other for ideas or had us doing nothing at all. 

Both actions weren't getting us any closer to knowing.  

In fact, it was just adding to our confusion.

The relief any of us want, when deciding if we are making the right choice or not, comes in action step of actually making the decision itself.

Just pick something. Choose one of your possibilities.

You then get to pour energy into moving forward on your decision, energy that before the decision was made, was being used...

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